


Beautiful Symmetries (sequel)

by Maldoror_Chant



Series: Beautiful Symmetries [2]
Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Humor, Light Angst, Multi, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-26 09:59:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12554924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maldoror_Chant/pseuds/Maldoror_Chant
Summary: AFTER hooking up is when a lot of stuff gets sorted out.





	1. 5 Simple Rules

**Author's Note:**

> Tonally and for other reasons, these chapters belong together more than they belong with the previous four in my mind, so I'm putting in as a sequel to the original Beautiful Symmetries.

I'm what you call a morning person. I've never needed an alarm. On any given morning I wake up on time and three seconds later I'm out of bed. I take about ten minutes to get cleaned and dressed, and then half an hour or so to do my morning martial forms before settling down to breakfast and the daily Preventer reports.

On that given morning I woke up on time and three seconds later I was in a different dimension altogether.

Heero was a solid, comforting presence on my left. His arm had slipped during the night and was now curled around my left forearm, fingers gripping lightly. His breath was teasing my cheek, in, out, in, out, slow and regular. I'd twitched towards that reassuring presence instinctively and caught a glimpse of a smooth cheek brushed by long lashes. He looked his age...My left fingers were twinned with his.

Duo must have tossed and turned during the night. He was spread out on the bed on my right perpendicular to my body, one leg dangling off the edge, his head resting on my upper thigh, a hand casually curled around my knee, warm through the cloth. His face was slightly turned towards me, I could see the impish features relaxed into innocence. I also noticed he was drooling on my sweatpants a little. My fingers were resting on the end of his braid.

I lay as still as I possibly could, though why they weren't woken up by the noise and concussive force of my heart exploding in my chest is a mystery.

The memories of the previous days stood in line to be the next to hit me with a mallet.

They weren't together...they were both in love with me...I was - insanely, utterly and compellingly - in love with both of them...and instead of kicking me out for that, they'd decided they were willing to share me...

I stared at the ceiling dappled in morning shadows while my mind ran around in circles; it was desperately rooting around looking for the guilt and shame I had to be feeling about this situation. It bowled over the intense relief I was experiencing, elbowed happiness out of the way, upset gratitude no end, took a worried peak at my libido (which was starting to stir and ask some interesting questions), and started rooting through all the reasons this was going to end in disaster, looking for something to hit me with.

It found only a firm resolve. Maybe Heero and Duo would realize that I wasn't worth the effort of sharing, or even the effort of keeping under any conditions. Maybe one or the other or both would leave me. Maybe the effort of sharing would prove too much for their friendship and this would end badly for all three of us. Maybe, maybe, maybe. But all these things were actually beyond my control; they depended on Heero and Duo. All I could do was be myself, not deny them what they were willing to share with me, and give them all I was capable of.

It was an instant of enlightenment, and in it I found something I'd never felt before; the peace I'd fought so hard to bring to others.

"You look better than you did yesterday."

It was more a breeze than a whisper. The eyelashes had lifted over serious cobalt blue eyes. I felt a pang of regret. This moment of unadulterated happiness was ending. The rest of my life was waiting for me, busy preparing any number of traps and pitfalls. I said nothing, childishly hoping to make it last, and leaned over to press my forehead against his. I felt the eyelashes sweep my cheek as he blinked in surprise at the gesture. I guess I'm not the most affectionate person at the best of times.

Duo snorted softly and his hand slipped from beneath my knee to rub his nose. He lifted his head and cracked open his eyes.

"Whu," he said as he looked blearily at the rumpled uniform he was still wearing.

"Wha-..." he added as he took in the fact he wasn't in his bed or in his room, glazed eyes resting on the dresser in confusion.

"Whaaa-?" His eyes widened and then widened again as he slowly turned to stare at Heero and me. At that point I remembered that Duo is _not_ a morning person.

"Good morning, Duo," Heero said seriously, as if waking up in bed with two other men was something he did on a weekly basis. Duo just gaped.

"...Coffee," he finally said as if it were the conclusion of a long and arduous equation.

"Breakfast," Heero said firmly, leaving my side - in the mundane light of morning and the gathering questions about *us*, I was able to relinquish their hold without whimpering like a damn baby. That memory had hit me along with the rest, not with a mallet but a sledgehammer. I felt mortified but that didn't stop me from feeling a pang at the sudden coolness on various points of my body (particularly where Duo had dribbled).

"You're eating." Heero added with a well-remembered death scowl in my direction. I was feeling hungry, which was a good sign, and fairly fit and rested as well. The body of the Gundam Pilot had fully recuperated from the stress of the previous days, despite no food and little sleep. The mind of the teenager inside the body was another matter. But I'm a proud and controlled man, I didn't let any of my worries and uncertainties appear on my face. I silently followed Heero as he carefully steered the zombie - that would become Duo after the administration of some caffeine - towards the kitchen.

Duo put his cup of coffee down with a loud clunk. I looked up from the eggs and rice Heero had made me, and he glanced up from his protein drink and laptop. Duo stared at us with wide blue eyes slowly coming into focus.

"D'we all sleep in the same bed last night?!"

Heero looked surprised, and I grimaced as I said: "You know, Duo, if you'd dreamt that, and we hadn't... you'd be in so much trouble right now for even asking that question, that if you lived to be a hundred you'd _still_ be in trouble."

Duo stared at me. "Uhn?" he said plaintively.

"Wufei, you probably don't know this," Heero told me seriously. "But you can't give Duo anything other than yes or no answers until his second cup."

"Uhn?" Duo said again, then shook his head. "We did, didn't we."

"Yes," Heero said gravely and went to fill Duo's cup again.

"Oh... " Duo said. Then nodded solemnly. "Cool." He started on his second cup.

I stirred but caught a look from Heero and a 'wait a sec' gesture.

Duo downed the cup and sat still for a moment, eyes turned inward. Then it was like someone had flicked a switch.

"So how are we going to work this? I think I've got to warn you guys, this isn't exactly something I've got any experience at. Man, you just had to be complicated, didn't you?" This in my direction. "Why did we fall for this guy again, Yuy? He's fussy, grumpy, doesn't have the sense to come in out of the rain and he ends up in police stations at odd hours of the morning." A foot bumped and rubbed against mine around the edge of the counter, taking the potential sting out of the words.

I watched in fascination. Heero didn't seem surprised by any of this. They'd had nearly a year of living together - even if it was on an 'on and off between missions' basis - to get used to each other in ways that I, their... well, the man they were interested in, for want of another expression, could never rival.

"At least Heero and I don't live on different colonies, that would make things complicated! But with you on earth it's bad enough..."

Heero got up in silence and poured Duo another cup while Duo snagged some bread off the counter and made some toast. He waited thirty seconds then popped the mechanism, fishing the two pieces out before putting more back in, leaving them longer until they were practically charcoal.

"At least me n' Heero have our own rooms, so whoever you-...but maybe I'm getting ahead of myself here," Duo added with a cheeky grin as Heero gave him a warning look. Duo jumped up to get some more stuff from another cupboard and the fridge. "'Ro, you want honey or jam?"

"I don't want any toast." Heero's eyes were once again on the laptop's screen and he answered absently.

"Honey it is then." Duo returned to the chair, took a sip of coffee and started buttering the lightly toasted bread then spread the honey thickly. "Let's start from the beginning, Feifei-"

"Wufei."

"Sure, baby." I nearly choked on a mouthful of rice. "How long do you have here before you have to report back to Preventer central?"

"...The original mission was going to take a few days, and I doubt Une will have anything for me right before the weekend. If no emergency comes up-" I watched, fascinated, as Duo sandwiched the two pieces of toast together and slid them stealthily and expertly into Heero's hand as the later reached for his protein drink. Heero didn't glance at it, eyes fixed on the computer. A slight frown crossed his face but that was all, and he started eating the toast mechanically. "If no emergency comes up I should be able to stay till Monday," I finished weakly.

"Outstanding!" Duo caught my puzzled glance. "Oh, I don't let him get away with drinking only that blended protein garbage for breakfast when I'm here. If there's one guy in this galaxy that I know needs more fibre in his diet, it's Heero."

"I didn't want any toast," Heero said, suddenly realizing what he was eating. He gave Duo a glare that was part annoyance, part resignation, and bit into the toast, returning his attention to the laptop.

I shook my head slightly. Hard to believe these two weren't together. Hell, hard to believe they weren't _married!_

Duo caught the gesture but misinterpreted it. "Still not awake, hon?" My fork clinked in the remains of the eggs. "Want some java?"

"No," I said, and couldn't for the life of me think of anything else to say. My mind was a blank.

Duo buttered his own nearly-carbonized toast, but he was looking at me with those violet-blue eyes of his, sharp and intelligent. He was smart enough to go from being an L2 street-kid to a Gundam pilot and master hacker and mechanic in a couple of years, but he also possessed a strong emotional wisdom far beyond his years. To my knowledge Duo had never been in a serious relationship, but he knew people and he was not a stranger to his own heart like Heero and I. If anyone can get us through this, I thought, it's Duo. But I would have to be careful to-

"Well, let's talk about all this tonight, when we're all here, and not just in the flesh, hm?" He grinned at me and at Heero who was concentrating on his day's schedule. "Maybe we should all take a bit of time today by ourselves and think about what, well, what we want out of this. I think I know what I want to do with my half of the Dragon," He gave me a sly grin that was deliciously seductive and made me blush, "-but we need everyone's input in this. Time to get cre-ative!" He leered and his eyes gleamed. Duo was getting waaay too into this.

I found myself watching Heero's bowed head. I assumed he did this every morning, go through his day's work while having breakfast. I did the same myself, and Duo did not seem to find this abnormal. But I did. We were talking about, well, about our future together, about a relationship that was going to take a lot of work and emotional investment. The screen of the laptop seemed to be getting bigger and bigger in my still sleep-fogged mind, like a battlement.

I glanced at Duo, but he was stuffing the rest of his toast in his mouth and seemed oblivious.

"What we need are some guidelines, I think," I said quietly, fishing.

"Guidelines?" Heero's head came up like a hound hearing a whistle, slight relief in the line of his shoulders. I'd been right.

Duo choked on his toast. "Gui - cough - guidelines? Like _rules_ and stuff?" He glared at me, visibly horrified.

"Of sorts," I said carefully. Meet the two men in my lives, ladies and gentlemen, I think I will call them Scylla and Charybdis. "Just to delimit things, make sure we-... we should talk about this tonight." I didn't think I could make any kind of clear statement at this point. Nothing was clear in my own head.

Duo looked uncertain, catching something in my tone. Then Heero stood up.

"We need to get to work, Duo."

"Oh okay," Duo muttered.

"I'll go and get ready. That's okay, Duo," Heero added without turning as the braided man slipped from his stool. "You can- I'll be a few minutes."

He walked up the stairs to their bathroom. Duo and I followed him with our eyes. It took us a few seconds to realize he was leaving us a bit of privacy.

Duo's eyes were narrowed at the door that had closed behind his partner. "... Am I going too fast for him, Fei?" he finally asked.

"Yes. I think so," I said softly. And waited with my heart curling up in my chest for his answer. How would he react to this? The strength of friendship built during the war would stop them from being bitter rivals, I felt sure. But that was a far cry from accepting to cater to 'the other man's' problems.

Duo's smile was a bit rueful but there was warmth in it as well. "I gotta watch that. I guess Heero isn't used to-... hell, he ain't used to anything like this. Took him long enough to understand what 'friends' are about, this is brand new territory for him. I'll try to keep that in mind."

Then he leapt up and leaned over and planted a firm kiss on my lips, short but enthusiastic. He was gone in a grin and pirouette of braid before I could react. I kept my hands tight on my plate and fork, because they were trembling slightly with relief. It was way too early in the morning to negotiate emotional hurdles.

"I'll go and dig him out of the bathroom. I know he doesn't take that long to brush his teeth, and we have to go. We'll shower later at the gym, once we put out the first fires of the day. Apparently one of the heads of that armament ops is trying to counter-sue Preventers and saying we planted evidence to drag him in to-"

"Just him?" I asked, getting up.

"Yeah, he's only trying to save his own skin, so of course we'll get him that way. His friends will be on him like flies on shit," Duo said with an earthy snicker.

"Good. Do you have a spare uniform?"

"Say what?" Duo looked back at me quizzically from the stairs.

"Spare uniform. I can't go to work like this." I gave my rumpled jumper and sweatpants an acid look.

"Who says you're going to work at all! You still need rest. Yeah-" he snapped as I opened my mouth. "I know you're a tough Gundam pilot and all but we're not in a war anymore, you don't have to run yourself to the edge and beyond, you can take a day off if you want. Besides this is my spare uniform, the other is at the dry-cleaners to get the bloodstains out. Oy, Heero!" Duo was shouting and pounding at the bathroom door. "Get your rear in gear, I want to go kick some gunrunner ass! Go and smooch Fei and then we'll get to it!"

I thought I heard something fall in the bathroom and Duo grinned down at me. He barged into the bathroom as the door opened, and reappeared three seconds later with his toothbrush.

"I'll get this done at work, I don't want to have to come home late this evening!" He said with a cheerful leer at me as he hustled past Heero, pulling at his uniform to remove some of the wrinkles of the night before.

He stopped half way across the living room as if an idea occurred to him. "Hey, apparently my dating life is a hot topic with the secretarial staff for some reason." For some reason, right. I rolled my eyes. "I hear they have a pool going. I wonder what odds they have for this kinda situa-"

"Duo!" Heero barked just as I snapped: "Maxwell, don't you dare-"

A teasing laugh informed us we'd been had. "Get a clue you two. Although I insist that what most people will be saying, or at least thinking, is, 'there go three lucky bastards'!"

"What they'll be saying will certainly include the word bastards," Heero muttered. "Though I don't particularly care what people think of any of us, Duo, let's try to keep this to ourselves? It's nobody else's business."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll get the car started and all that, Yuy, but don't take too long." The leer was tossed Heero's way as Duo nearly knocked down the door to the garage and slammed it behind him.

The house seemed to expand around us with the sudden silence of a mausoleum.

I approached Heero who was hanging at the foot of the stairs, glaring at the door.

"Are you okay with this? With us?" I asked quickly, knowing I didn't have much time. Besides Heero never had any problems with blunt and to the point.

Heero looked at me carefully, weighing my question.

"I know it's not..." I tried to show him I'd understand if he had reservations. "Duo assumes that everyone's going to be okay with sharing someone, and I guess he's got the enthusiasm to carry it, but I know it's not normal, and that-"

"Normal?" Heero said softly. I've worn my own hard-assed bastard mask for so long I can recognize someone else's, and I saw it slip for a moment. He was confused...but it wasn't because of having to share me with Duo. The whole thing was new and bewildering to him, and maybe just a little bit frightening. I could sympathize.

Heero smiled and caught my hand, then tugged me forward and brushed my lips with his own. "We're not normal. Any of us. And we're good at achieving the impossible. I'm okay with it. I have to go."

"Do you have a spare uniform?" I asked quickly as he headed towards the door, my mind coming back to more practical concerns.

Heero glanced at me in surprise. "No, it's at the-"

"Dry-cleaners." I sighed. "Damn."

Heero smiled slightly. "You have your laptop, don't you? I'll give you access to the statement files once I get to the office. Can you formulate an outline of interrogation and research for the gunrunner outfit's middle-men? We're short staffed. I'll have some more stuff for you when you're ready."

"Anything," I said gratefully. I didn't want another day of staring at the kitchen counter.

"Don't overdo it," he said, hand on the garage door.

I snorted. "You have no lessons to give to me in that respect, Yuy."

He nodded slightly. "We will do our best to get home not too late tonight." Although of course we both knew - and Duo did as well - that work came first. "And I'll have to take a little time today to think about what I want to do with _my_ half of the dragon." His eyes glinted slightly and the smile became something of a smirk. I found myself blushing furiously and scowled at him until he left with an amused snort.

I went over to the counter to pick up the plates and tidy up, mind finally kicking into gear. I'd spent so long admiring their smooth relationship with each other - and rubbing my nose in their supposed bliss - that I'd missed the subtle gap between them. But suddenly it seemed to make sense what Duo had said, that they couldn't spend more than a few weeks together without driving each other crazy. They were close friends and partners, but still so very different.

But they were both already making the effort to bridge that gap. For me, for my sake. I felt humbled and grateful, I would really have to -...to-...shit!

The plates crashed into the sink. I'd heard the car leave the garage at the edge of my awareness, so I lunged towards the front door. I ran down the short walk, vaulted over the fence and threw myself out into the road and in front of the car just as Duo was about to hit the accelerator. Fortunately he found the brakes just as quickly. I had a glimpse of four very wide eyes and two jaws hanging open as I ran around the car towards the passenger side. Heero was already opening the door and struggling with his seatbelt. I jerked the door further open and leaned in.

"Wu-" 

I grabbed him by the back of the neck and fastened my lips on his.

"Fei?! What kinda stupid stunt- I almost ran y-um omfer mma...mm?" I'd relinquished Heero, leaned over him and grabbed Duo by the collar and interrupted him in mid-rant.

I leaned back - one knee stuck on the edge of Heero's seat for balance - and looked at them both and said, quickly, before my usual reserve could recover its surprise and gag me: "I didn't actually _tell_ you last night. Or this morning. I do-..." Damn it Chang! "I do love you. Both of you. I probably shouldn't, but I don't think I can even see how I couldn't. Not love you I mean. Both. I-...I'm grateful and- and honored that you are willing to try to- to make me happy. I'll try to be worth it. You don't have half a dragon each. You have all of me and more, and as much as I can give, the both of you. Um. Have a good day at work." The last came out a bit strangled as that little gem of a speech replayed itself in my mind.

I started to close the door. Heero's hand stopped me.

"Wufei?" He stared at me, leaning out slightly. "Are you _sure_ you're okay?"

"He's fine, Yuy. Close the door, I'll translate on the way to work." I could hear the grin in Duo's voice. "Have a good day, sweetie! We'll be home for supper. I hope."

The car drove away in a squeal of tires as Heero banged the door shut. I stared after it, then slowly turned as my war-honed instincts informed me that there had been someone else in the street all along.

The dog was one of those miniature boxer types. It was staring at me with bulging, goggly eyes. Its owner - thick-jowled, mid-sixties - was staring at me with the exact same expression as the dog.

I tried to smile arrogantly, but it was so weak and pathetic I gave up and simply stared back.

The man's jaw tightened, he turned and jerked the dog, who had continued to stare at me with, I am sure, a look between amazement and contempt. I heard the man mutter as he walked away. It could have been any number of things, from the most insulting comment to a promise of calling the police when he got home, and I was ready for any of it.

Instead, and I know I heard it clearly and was not mistaken, he muttered something about 'three lucky bastards' and tromped off.

...Life is a lot stranger than you'd think.

 

 

Twenty five minutes later, after I'd washed up the breakfast plates and opened my laptop, I received the file access password from Heero and a short note.

'The outline of what we need is in the files. I repeat, don't overdo it. HY."

'Thank you.' I sent back, in honest gratitude.

Five minutes later another mail landed in my inbox.

'I can't believe Heero unloaded the entire second-level staff statements on you! Damn it I know you're tough but it's more than the last few days I happen to KNOW when it was you last took a break from your continuous solo missions you sad bastard and even Une wouldn't mind if you took one day off you know!!! You can work on this but if Heero tries to get you to do more tell him to shove it! Now you're going to eat this lunchtime and we don't have time to come home and spoonfeed you but you are going to eat, mate, and that's final. There's list of takeout places on the fridge. I recommend the Happy Hamster Pizza Parlor, but maybe you'd like Chinese. Don't order from the Japanese place, they don't cook their stuff right, only Heero can eat that shit and get away with it. Even bacteria is scared of him I guess. We should be home by eight tonight. Love ya! Duo. PS: If you don't eat anything I'll kick your ass.'

'Yes Mom.' I sent back. An answer bounced back two minutes later, its content was not something I would have sent through a company e-mail server.

I started sifting through the files. A part of me was holding on to the wonder and peace I'd felt this morning, like a ray of light that somehow refused to dim. My...my two-...my boyfriends. Night and day, sun and moon. My two loves.

I shook myself soundly and applied myself to my work.

 

 

"You know, he's really cute like that. Hey, maybe we should take a picture!"

"No, Duo."

I glanced up. As evening had drawn around the small house, draping the bland furniture in darkness, the fatigue from the previous two nights had returned and I'd taken a short nap before Heero and Duo showed up. They had approached without a noise and were standing above me in the same pose as the night before. I hid a smile. Then realized I didn't have to, and smiled openly.

Heero's eyes were warm on me as he graced my efforts with a small smile of his own. Duo grinned like a fox and lifted a finger in the air.

"I have the rules!" he said.

"Rules?" I blinked and looked at him in surprised.

"Yeah, well, apparently you guys need your hands held." He gave an elaborate 'whatever' shrug, which was too theatrical to take seriously.

I gathered myself up gracefully to sit cross-legged on the bed like I had done the previous night and nodded graciously for him to proceed.

"Rule number one! I actually thought about this real hard and I think you'll be okay with these. If I missed anything- anyway, rule number one! We talk it out, we don't run out - right Fei? Or shut everybody else out, and that one's for you, Yuy. I know what you're like when you're upset about something." The tones were merry. A serious light lingered in his eyes. "If there's a problem, we talk. Or use grunts and sign language if you're Heero. But communicate either way."

I nodded firmly. Heero made a minimalist head movement. That one was fairly obvious.

"Rule number two: we stop all this self-sacrificing shit. We try to make it work together, and we stop the 'things will be simpler if I wasn't between you' bull, 'cause -...'cause I think, if nothing else, after all we've been through, I think there's one thing we live by. We don't leave a man behind. Right? Unless we shoot him but that could get messy and the law kinda frowns on that now and we're supposed to be the good guys this time around."

"Duo," I said patiently, trying to get him back to the point. Heero had crossed his hands on his chest and was listening seriously.

"Right. Rule number three! This one's particularly for you, Fei. It's not maths."

"What?"

"It's not maths. You can't run around trying to balance out the affection you're laying on one and worry you're neglecting the other. It doesn't work that way. I don't want it to work that way, and I don't think Heero does either. You give us what you want when it feels right, not because you have to. Okay?"

I frowned in concern. This was something that had been worrying me all day. "But that's-...that could be a problem. I mean, I do love you both-" amazingly that had come out with barely a stutter "but what if one of you doesn't feel it, feel like I'm being fair to-"

"Rule number one," Duo interrupted me with a sharp glance and a lifted finger.

"Huh?"

"Rule number one," Heero said quietly. "If one of us is unhappy, he'll say so."

"Yeah, we'll talk about it and we'll sort it out." Duo nodded firmly and beamed at Heero.

"...Just make sure you talk clearly." I scowled. "If you recall, you both tried to drop hints to me while we were on our first missions together, about how you felt about me-"

"Good point. I'll amend rule number one. No grunts or sign language, Heero, make sure it's bloody clear because Fei-baby here can't pick up a clue if you shoot it at him with a Vulcan."

"Maxwell-" I started to growl.

"Rule number four! We make time for each other. We're all workaholics - well you two are, I'm more of a work-binger - so we're gonna have to work at that one, but we make time for each of us to have some one-on-one with Wufei. And me and Hee-kun make time to hang out on occasion too, just the two of us. This is just so I can continue to trash his ass playing hoops at lunchtime. And I think it'd be good if we can also go out the three of us too," Duo added. "If nothing else, it'll be fun, right, Wu-baby?"

I sighed.

"Rule number five!"

"No pet-names?" I suggested hopefully.

"Acceptable," Heero muttered.

Duo glared at the both of us. "Noooo. C'mon, guys, get serious."

The irony of that comment from Duo almost made me choke. I coughed instead as a pair of blue eyes pinned me to the bed, and made a gesture for him to speak.

"Rule number five..." Duo looked very serious, even grave. He put a hand on Heero's shoulder to emphasize his words and leaned forward slightly.

Heero is the strongest of us, but Duo is the quickest. Even Yuy's astounding reflexes couldn't save him from being shoved forward onto the bed and into my startled arms. Half a second later a second body hit us both and we fell down in a tumble of limbs on the bed.

"Maxwell!" I snapped - Heero just made a sort of low growl in his throat. He was face down against the covers, struggling to get an arm beneath him without hurting me, but we were tangled together. I couldn't roll away from him because my other arm was hooked into Duo's as he lay on his side, chin in his hand, looking as cool and casual as if he were sunning himself on the beach as he watched us struggle, visibly amused.

"Rule number five." His grin became a leer. "...is a rule we'll elaborate on later when you two straight-laced uptown girls are a bit less self-conscious about your bodies. Once you've outgrown this adorable teenage clumsiness we'll discuss it, assuming we've not figured it out alread- ack!"

Well, he was dealing with Gundam pilots one and five, right?

"Where did you say his weak spots were, Heero?"

"Ribs - hold him - sides but above all-"

" _Don't you dare Yuy!_ "

"Feet. Hold his legs."

"Agh!"

Call them rules, guidelines or a roadmap to our future...Either way, we would probably be all right.


	2. 6 Degrees of Separation

We ended up sleeping together again. It wasn't anything sexual - I think we were several months away from needing a rule number five - but it certainly made me feel loved. I was in danger of losing my hard-won edge of cynicism and irritability, waking up two days in a row with the men I loved curled up on either side of me.

The evening before had been short. They had come back home late with some mediocre take-out; Heero had apparently never developed taste-buds during his training and Duo could eat anything. They were tired from the more tedious aspect of the weapons-manufacture case. It was something we'd gotten used to during our time with Preventers. It occasionally made us long for the days when we could blow things up without having to fill in a form in triplicate, but we were wise enough to realize why our society now wanted to keep track of us, so we accepted it. The price of peace, I guess.

So we had a quick supper then we went for a run. We showered and ended up in sweatpants and t-shirts on my bed, talking. I think it was supposed to be about 'us', maybe elaborate a little on Duo's rules, but the conversation never got there. It started with the last time the three of us had been alone, just as a reference - locked up and handcuffed in an OZ cell on the lunar base, some reference! - but that lead us off on a tangent of war-time memories and we lingered over old friends and enemies, living and dead. We were seventeen and we were old war-horses already. It amused and saddened me in turn, but I think I was the only one to reflect on that. Neither of my two... - boyfriends, dammit! One of these days I'd get used to it. Neither of my two boyfriends were the kind to wax philosophical. We didn't talk about us, but in a way that was what we were doing. Remembering who we were and how we used to work together.

We fell asleep in a pile on the covers. One of us - probably Heero - woke up and rearranged us a little better, and drew the blankets around us carefully. And we woke up that way in the morning, and I was already feeling less embarrassed and worried about this. I was apparently more adaptable than I'd thought.

We had a quick breakfast and I put on Heero's freshly pressed spare uniform, much to Duo's disapproval. But I'd had quite enough of staying at home. Duo was very stubborn but I could still give him lessons in that respect. We ended up driving to work together, with me in the backseat, studiously ignoring the old man walking his dog again and looking at us pulling out of the garage optimistically, hoping for another show. This love thing...it was like brain-fever. But I firmly resolved - ignoring the curious googly eyes of the man and the mutt - to do nothing today at work that was remotely as foolish or revealing as I had yesterday. I had an image to maintain. Besides, there was one rule that was so fundamental that it hadn't even needed a number from Duo: this was our own private business. We would tell the privileged few of our friends when we were good and ready, and the rest of the world could rot in blind ignorance for all we cared.

Good plan.

I hadn't realized how hard it would be to put into effect. This was the first time we'd been out in public since we'd gotten together. I was sitting at a spare desk, drinking some very bad tea, and my eyes were hopelessly glued to one or the other of the two. To my utter confusion, I found myself missing all the little touches we had been sharing at home (not to mention the kissing and the play-fighting and the sleeping together, but that would be hard to accomplish in the middle of a busy office). I hadn't realized how much we'd been touching these last two days. Little gestures; hands on shoulders, on hips, leaning back to back, a poke in the ribs, a quick brush of hips or hands while cooking or cleaning up. It was that love thing again! Before this fever burned out my brain, I had been as tactile and affectionate as a cactus, a grouchy one at that. Now I was in an office full of strangers looking at me curiously, and all I could think about was how I wanted to put my arm around Heero's waist while I was reading over his shoulder, or grab Duo by the braid and drag him away from that flirtatious field agent.

It was almost a relief when the sour-faced assistant dumped three tons of assorted paperwork into my temporary In tray. She looked at me over her purple-rimmed glasses and told me she had more for me as soon as I'd finished with those, and that she'd appreciate them back before she left that evening, she would be going at four because she had an appointment with her chiropractor, apparently one of her vertebrae wasn't aligned properly.

I gave her the look that would send anyone, bar Gundam pilots and Sally, running for cover.

She started, blinked a few times, and in a voice that was considerably more polite at least, asked me if I was related to agent Yuy.

I ignored her and bent over the paperwork. The mission took priority. I geared my mind to it with the same determination I'd applied during wartime and I barely acknowledged Duo as he sat down near me to work through his files, serious eyes on his screen as he played with the end of his braid. Heero came to join us as well after an hour.

One of the middlemen had coughed up an interesting line of inquiry into a possible terrorist group they'd sold weapons to. The lead would take us most of the day and part of the night to follow through, on paper and electronically to start with. Duo and I ran through records and notes from informants and placed calls. Then Heero looked up from his laptop.

"Une just contacted me," he said quietly, a finger tapping the screen. "We have information. This group could be hiding out in that old OZ base near Syowa. The place is huge, spread out over several hundred square miles, barracks, silos, MS depot, the works. Une wants me and Wufei to go down there and check it out." He was looking at Duo as he said that. So did I.

Duo's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh. How long will you be gone?"

"If we find nothing? Two days. Maybe three. If we find something, well, probably longer."

"Oh," Duo said again, then blinked as he took in our expressions. "Hey guys, don't worry." His smile looked a little damp to me though. "I mean, we all knew this would happen one day. I don't mind! Well, except if this is gonna be at the L4 tourist resort or on a beach somewhere, then I bloody will mind! Where is this Sy-place anyway?"

"Syowa? It's that big base in Antarctica."

Duo spluttered. "It's November down on Earth!"

"Yes."

Duo made an expansive and generous gesture. "They're all yours, boys. Go get 'em."

"You sure you don't mind? We'd be leaving you with a lot of the paperwork here," Heero said seriously.

"No no no, I'm very sensitive to frostbite. And I'm probably allergic to penguins." Duo smirked. "Don't mind me, you two have fun!"

"I-" Heero closed his mouth sharply, eyes distant as if a thought had struck him. Then he turned towards me slowly. "Wufei, I... maybe we should-"

"Agent Yuy?" The assistant popped up, absently dumping yet more paperwork into my In tray. I glared at it but it failed to catch fire. "Agent Wilson wants you in interrogation room five pronto, he says one of the bosses has some info about the Antarctica thing."

"Hn." Heero looked annoyed. I caught his eyes as he stood up.

"What did you want to ask me, Heero?"

His glance flickered over the assistant. "I'll talk to you later. Nothing critical."

"Okay." I realized I was watching his confident steps as he headed out of the main office, and twitched my eyes away just as I was noting how perfectly a preventer uniform suited the fall of his hips. My eyes caught on Duo's serious face, and the way he was pouting slightly as he concentrated on his laptop, his braid sensuously caressing his lips-

I bent over the paperwork which was, as a whole, a lot safer. With the amount of work we had, and the fact that Heero and I would be gone tomorrow, we'd be stuck here until late tonight. No point letting my mind wander down fruitless avenues when it would be many hours before we got home.

I left to check what kind of supplies we had ready for our trip tomorrow, knowing that a good Preventer depot should have everything for a trip to Antarctica excluding the dog and sleigh. Reassured, I returned to my desk to discover two notes waiting for me there. One was in Heero's curt script, informing me that something had come up and he would be spending his lunch break in a meeting. That was when I realized it was nearly noon. I looked at the other note, covered in Duo's messy handwriting, with some resignation. My other boyfriend had probably been called away too. I'd end up eating lunch with the assistant and getting more information about her back problems.

But Duo's note asked me to meet him at noon in a room in the Archives. I glanced at my watch and made my way to the top of the building, where Archives occupied most of the top floor. The entrance was just before the roof access to the MS and helicopter landing pad, and I saw no-one on the entire floor until I opened the door.

I gave a small nod to the girl behind the counter on the far side of the archives. She nodded back, but then stared at me as if wondering what I was doing here during my lunch break. I was rather curious about that as well.

I found the door indicated by the note at the end of a long hallway that didn't look frequently used. Though I thought I heard the archivist's hesitant footsteps at the other end of the corridor. I hoped she didn't want to follow me and have a conversation. I was not in the mood. Actually I'm never in the mood for casual chats. I reminded myself sternly that I wasn't back on Earth HQ here; people didn't know me. People didn't cross hallways, dive under their desks or knock over the water fountain in their haste to get out of my way when they recognized one of many signs of a bad mood on my face as I approached. This wasn't my home territory and my sense of etiquette and propriety told me that anything out of order would reflect badly on Heero and Duo, and I'd rather cut off my arm than do that. I'd even be polite to the secretary or the archivist if need be. They worked with Heero on a regular basis so that in itself should be a pleasant surprise for them.

Crude light barged in through a broken shade on one side of the room and hounded the dust up across its beams. Every wall was lined with metal shelves piled high with stack upon messy stack of paper folders, old computer media and a few locked evidence boxes. Duo was sitting on a small table in a pool of artificial sunshine eating a sandwich and kicking his legs idly. He brightened up as he saw me.

"Ah, Fei! Good timing. Have a sandwich?"

"We're here to eat?"

"Nope!" As I approached the table, Duo put down his lunch and took a long swig of water from a bottle.

"Good, because I don't think - mf!"

Duo - he really was remarkably fast - had leapt off the table, laminated himself to my body and was kissing me soundly.

"Maxwell!" I snapped, after prying us a bit apart. Bright blue eyes looked at me quizzically. "What are you doing?"

"Well it's called kissing, but if you needed me to tell you that, you're even more of an innocent than I thought."

I resisted the urge to punch the cheerful teasing smile. His arms had tightened over mine, making it hard for me to resort to violence anyway. "I meant, Duo, this is not the time or place for-"

"What? What are you talking about? Making out in discreet corners during lunch break is a time-honored tradition that dates back centuries."

"I-"

"And here I though you were a traditionalist!"

"Maxwell-" I growled. The arms tightened playfully - but very firmly - over mine as I tried to break away.

"Not to mention a scholar!"

"I-"

"Didn't they teach you anything in the academ-"

With my arms pinned, I really only had the one means of gagging him at my disposal. Besides, he's right. I am a traditionalist. And for once one of the age-old customs I was asked to follow actually proved enjoyable. I felt a faint guilt at the thought of Heero, as my relinquished arms curled around Duo's waist. It was a reflex; even though I knew this was part of the deal, and that I would also have time alone with him during the mission...I banished the thought. This was something the three of us would get used to, and in the meantime I would not let my uncertainties ruin my moment with Duo.

Besides, who needed qualms to ruin the moment when nosy archivists could do just as good a job?

A gasp alerted us, and a clunk as she tried to back out of the door too quickly and ended up pressed awkwardly against the jamb. She was petite, Asian, and with her wide eyes, the two bright circles of colour on her cheeks and her mouth pursed in an 'oh' of shock, she looked like an exquisite porcelain doll. Duo and I stared at her for a split second, then his eyes flickered to me and he winced at my air of chagrin. The latter was actually due to the mortification of a warrior realizing he'd been so engrossed in kissing his boyfriend that he'd let a civilian open a door and enter a room behind him unnoticed, but embarrassment was probably close behind and Duo must have realized it.

"Dammit!" he shouted. The archivist hiccuped and bumped her head slightly as she jerked back against the doorjamb at the explosion in the quiet dusty room. "Where can a guy go to get a little peace around here?!"

"Duo-" I started, embarrassed.

"No, really!" He relinquished his hold on me and made huge sweeping gestures around us, two bright spots of anger flaring on his cheeks. "This is the dead files room, dammit! These cases are defunct! We only keep them because we worship paper! The stuff in here is so old, Noah signed most of the witness statements! No-one ever comes up here, it's less popular than the morgue!"

He was advancing on the poor archivist who had gone a pretty shade of pink rarely seen on oriental skin.

"So tell me, what's a guy got to do to have some quality time with his squeeze, huh? Go down to the flooded third sub-basement and lock himself in an empty broom-closet with a note on the door saying 'beware of the dog' - mf!"

"Don't worry," I said over Duo's shoulder as he huffed and muffed against my hand gagging him. "He doesn't bite."

The archivist made a sound like a mouse getting squished, finally found her legs and darted out of the room with one last stare. Strangely enough it was me she was staring at, not Duo. Maybe she was disappointed someone of the same ethnicity was making out in her archives with such a gorgeous lunatic.

I glanced at the small nip marks on my fingers - so much for not biting - then up at a fuming Duo.

"Dammit! Hah, rats. I'm sorry, Fei. You must be furious. Shit, I normally have to draw my gun to get our research staff to move their butts and come up here."

"Duo, that was the archivist."

"Huh?"

"She works here," I clarified.

"Really? Someone actually works here?" Duo looked at me in amazement, then with some small sympathy at the half-opened door. "Poor slob, remind me to be nice to her someday."

"You can start by apologi-"

"But not today! Damn." He rubbed the back of his neck, sending his braid swaying, and looked at me from the corner of his eyes with a wince. "I guess that kinda spoiled the mood... "

"That's one way of seeing it."

He blinked as he noticed my own lack of ranting. "What's-what's the other?"

"That the worst has already happened," I said resignedly and tugged him into my arms again. I wouldn't have the opportunity for several days after this, it would be a shame to waste it. I felt pretty certain the archivist wouldn't come and disturb us again. I just hoped she'd have the good taste not to tattle. Or I might let Duo bite her after all.

Despite my words we didn't stay in the archives too long. I didn't feel like giving rise to more speculation about what we were doing. We took our sandwiches outside; Duo had brought some for me. We sat on the roof and watched the buildings and streets of the colony curve over our heads like alien skies, and we talked and relaxed and enjoyed ourselves for twenty precious minutes. Then we returned to our respective desks, knowing that yet more information would have landed on them in the meantime.

To my surprise I found a email from Sally in my inbox. 'Wufei, call me.' I normally called Sally about once a month (because otherwise she'd fuss at me, that was the only reason) and we'd talked less than two weeks ago. I shrugged and decided to call her this weekend, or when I got home on Monday.

 

 

"Agent Chang?"

"Yes?" I glared up at the assistant, daring her to dump more paperwork on me or even mention her vertebra.

"Agent Yuy is online with Commander Une in conference room two. She asked if you could join them please."

"Be right there," I said with some relief, standing and stretching.

Une was already online and talking to Heero when I entered the darkened room. The large conference screen showed the commander somewhat larger than life in her usual pose, hands clasped on her desk and the light shining off her glasses.

"Wufei, thanks for joining us," Une said crisply. "We need to review a few of the points for your upcoming mission. First of all, has medical cleared you? I heard you were injured-"

"Minor," I said briskly with an annoyed wave of my hand.

"Very well." Once again, Une didn't make a fuss over my curtness. She was used to dealing with Heero and I. "Let's have a look at the mission specs. Oh, you mentioned in an email that there might be a problem, Heero?"

I glanced at Heero in surprise. He had started to say something earlier. But we'd crossed in the middle of the busy office a couple of times after he finished the interrogation and he'd not mentioned anything then, so it'd slipped my mind.

He was shifting in his seat and that made all my senses prickle. Heero does not do 'nervous gestures' any more than I do 'uncertain' or Une does 'helpless airhead'.

"I...it occurred to me..." His eyes darted towards mine. "Could I have a moment to discuss this with Wufei first, ma'am? I've not had the opportunity to-"

Une looked curious and nodded. "I can't see what there is to discuss, but go ahead. Quickly though."

"I meant in private, ma'am."

Une's elegant eyebrows arched over the firm nose. "Private? I'm certain any issue regarding this mission can be discussed in my presence, and I'd appreciate promptness, agent Yuy. These calls are expensive, I have a meeting soon, and this mission is urgent. What is the problem?"

Heero leaned back into the seat and his face took that dangerous sombre mask that I recognized from war-time. Apparently Une did so too, she started to frown. "Spit it out, Yuy. If this is serious, I want to know now. What is it, do you foresee a problem with the mission?"

"No," Heero replied promptly, though he was still frowning defensively.

"So what?" Suddenly Une's frown was turned in my direction as if remembering some particulars about my character. "Is there a problem with Chang being your partner?"

I gave Une my best 'arrogant dragon' look...before the nasty little silence besides me brought my head around so fast I nearly misaligned my own vertebra. Heero was rigid in the chair, his face set in hard lines. His eyes as they caught mine looked pained. I opened my mouth but Une beat me to it.

" _Chang!_ " Une is no longer prone to psychotic episodes; we now call them 'mood swings' and dodge them like bullets. Both Heero and I stiffened as 'war-time' Une made a small reappearance. "I can't believe it! Can't you bring that foul temper of yours under control just this once? I know you're about as easy to partner as a porcupine, but I thought that surely you would make an effort with Yuy. Even a stubborn ass like yourself was willing to admit he's one of the best! If you can't partner him, who on earth are you going to-"

"Just a minute!" I barked, finally recuperating, just as Heero leaned forward and said, sharply: "Ma'am, you misunderstand."

"Look, Yuy, I know he's hard to get along with sometimes, but whatever he's done, can't you overlook it?"

"Ma'am," Heero said firmly. "He's not done anything. I would gladly go with Wufei through hell itself if I had to."

My own rumpled emotions were soothed at the sincerity and shiver of feeling in his voice. It got through to Une as well.

"Oh. So what's the problem? Look, if _he_ told you that he doesn't want to partner you, please, just ignore him. It's what I do. I go through this with him every time I assign him a new -"

"I never said anything!" I snapped, ignoring a machine-gun stare from behind the glass panes. "I'm ready to go! Heero..." I turned to see him lean stiffly back in the chair, his eyes disappearing behind his bangs. I resisted the urge to brush them out of the way. "What's wrong?"

"That's what I'd like to know," Une grumbled. Her words covered Heero's mutter.

"What?" I leaned towards him and he repeated them. I caught a glimpse of his eyes at that point. He was visibly torn and worried, and I could now understand why.

I turned towards Heero's commander. Oh, she was mine as well on paper. In practice, I consider Une and the rest of the Preventers to be my, shall we say, my staff, working for me to help me keep the peace. It sounds arrogant, but I have always been very independent, and am now wary of organisations that might try to use me. Consider my history...

Heero was different. He'd either work alone or, once the Preventers had the incredible honour and good fortune of convincing him to join them, he'd work all out for them. He'd obey them the same way he'd obeyed Doctor J. Maybe not entirely without question - we had all grown up a lot during the war and its aftermath and we no longer followed orders blindly - but thoroughly, and he'd obey all the rules imposed on him like the excellent soldier he was.

Even this rule.

Damn.

From the way he couldn't raise his voice above a whisper, he must have been torn. It hurt me to see him like that. He was thinking I wouldn't understand, that I'd be upset he'd rather obey a rule that really didn't apply to people like us rather than partner me. He also knew how I'd feel about admitting that this rule applied to us in the first place. His eyes held a mixture of firm resolve and pain as he shifted under my gaze, waiting for my biting comment.

I turned back to Une.

"We will need special dispensation from you, Commander."

Une's eyebrows shot up. "What? You're saying I'm the problem here?"

"Well-"

"Damn it, I want you both to go!"

"Yes, but-"

"I want you to go, he wants to go, you want to go! If there's anyone here who doesn't want you to go, can you please tell him to step forward now so I can have him dragged out and shot!"

I was pretty sure she was kidding. She had mood-swings, but she'd left most of her wartime persona behind her.

"We need dispensation to get around the fraternisation protocol, ma'am," I said evenly. I felt Heero shift besides me.

"Frater- what?" Une stared at me as if I'd turned inside out. "Why on earth- how would that apply to you?"

Oh great, I was going to have to spell it out. "Agent Yuy and myself are a -" I strangled the word 'couple' before it came out, I didn't want to lie to Une and I didn't want to go _there_ either. " ...involved," I concluded.

Une's eyes widened and widened again and started darting from me to Heero and back again. They looked like a pair of fish in two bowls. "This is a joke, right?" she said hopefully, then remembered who she was talking to. She reached blindly for her glasses, missed by an inch, tried again, took them off, started cleaning them mechanically. Her eyes continued to roam between Heero and myself. "Oh," she finally said. A faint flush appeared on her cheek.

I glanced at Heero who'd disappeared behind his bangs again, his hands white-knuckled on the armrests of his chair. I hated this, to see the hardened warrior so defensive. But this was all very new to him, and daunting too. He'd fought so hard against forming friendships with the rest of us because of this, because of the day he might be torn between his duty and his feelings for us. Now the internal conflict had escalated dramatically against a backdrop of a very new and strange relationship. He knew that I didn't respect all the nitty gritty rules and regulations of Preventers if they interfered with my job, and he also knew I'd not wanted to let our relationship be known. He thought I was angry with him and, with the sudden closeness between us removing all his barriers, he didn't know how to deal with that fact.

I dropped my hand to his as it crushed the innocent armrest, pried his fingers away before he broke it. We could discuss this later when Une wasn't furiously cleaning her glasses at us, but I didn't want to leave him like that, I couldn't. My pride, my reserve, they didn't even have a chance to object. I twinned my fingers around his and brought the back of his hand gently to my lips.

I was rewarded with a startled glance, a look of relief and a crunching sound from the viewer. Une had put her thumb through one of the lenses in her glasses.

"Well!" she said, trying to regain the self-assured composure that characterized her now. It was ruined by the fact she instinctively shoved her glasses back onto her nose. She blinked at us through one glass lens and one empty frame before ripping the glasses from her nose again. I was relieved Duo wasn't here, he'd laugh up a lung. Heero and I were made of sterner stuff, dropping our eyes and giving a slight cough to cover the moment. The fact we did it at exactly the same time somewhat ruined the serious effect. I could feel Une's glare from the viewer, it was like a flame-thrower.

"Well, thank you for sharing, agents. For your information this does rather complicate things. I can give dispensation, but the rules state I have to have you reviewed by a counselor first, to make sure this won't interfere- yes, I know," she said abruptly as both Heero and myself glared at her. "I know you are perfectly capable of putting your emotions aside to do the job, and you would not let this interfere, but the rules state that this cannot be my judgement call alone. I'm sure we can get this...technicality out of the way and get you partnered in the future, but we won't have time for this mission. Damn." Une rubbed the wear spot on the bridge of her nose left by her glasses and glared at the folder before her. "Well, thank you for your candor, agents. I am going to have to see what I can do about this. I'll get in touch with you later. Goodbye." Her voice was tart as she leaned over and flicked off the viewer.

There was silence in the room for a few seconds. We sat side by side, our hands still clasped. Then Heero shifted, standing slowly, trying to loosen my grip.

"I'm sorry, I wanted to talk to you first but we were never alone. I realize-"

I stood up as well, tugged him forward by the hand I was still holding and grabbed his chin with the other. "I would never ask you to compromise your values, Heero. You should know that."

"I know you don't really regard these regulations as important," he corrected with his usual precision, face hard, eyes distant. I recognized the mask he was wearing and rolled my eyes. "I can understand if - " he gasped as I closed his mouth with my own. He went rigid for two seconds then leaned back. "What are you doing?"

"Following an age-old tradition, I understand. Oh, just a minute." I went and locked the door. I hoped that would be enough, I didn't have any sign saying 'beware of the dog' handy.

 

 

There was a new email from Sally in my inbox when I left the conference room and returned to my desk ten interesting minutes later.

'Wufei I'm at work, you know the number, call me!'

I frowned. Now what? I hesitated, but dismissed it. We were too busy. I'd call her tonight, if I could borrow Heero and Duo's phone. I'd treat them to dinner - at some point, when we got back from the mission, assuming we were going - to compensate them.

The afternoon was getting intense. More and more information came out from the interrogations, sending Duo to contact some L2 informants and Heero into more meetings. And buried me in more paperwork.

The next email in my inbox was abrupt and had an exclamation mark attached to it. 'Wufei, call me NOW. I'm still at work and will be so for another hour.'

I hesitated. What was this, problems with her husband? Yeah, right, I'd make a prime marriage counselor. Even Sally, who somehow managed to like me, wasn't blind to my shortcomings. Besides she could always call Noin. So what- maybe she was pregnant. I winced. Great, that's all I needed...

I didn't call her though. Whatever her news, Sally would never hang up without inquiring about me and teasing me about my love-life - with a good long look to make me understand that this was more a hint than a joke. She was still trying to set me up with some girls, though being at a distance hampered her style.

Now, once the universe stopped spinning around me like a merry-go-round, I'd certainly tell her about the change in my life. I knew Sally would be - well, she'd be surprised, and yes, probably shocked, but she wouldn't be condemning. She knew too much about Gundam pilots and the hardships we'd gone through together to be judgmental about anything that could help us bear it. No, I thought Sally would be happy for me, once she'd reattached her jaw and put her eyes back in their sockets. So yes, I was quite looking forward to calling her eventually. When she started badgering me about finding a mate, I would have the comeback of the century, and I was not above using it.

The reason I didn't want to call her _now_ though...three days ago I was her solitary, grumpy dragon who refused to give a girlfriend a chance. Now I was a highly confused dragon with two boyfriends. Once I got used to the shock - in a month or two - I'd enjoy passing it on to Sally. In the meantime, I'd just concentrate on dealing with it.

 

 

I spent several hours in an interrogation room myself, wringing as much information about the alleged terrorist cell from our captives that I could, before taking a break.

Heero cornered me by the coffee machine where I was emptying out the drawers searching for tea that didn't taste like it came out of the wrong end of a cat.

"Une says she can't get us dispensation in time for Antarctica," he said quietly, eyes downcast.

"So what about the mission?" I asked, trying not to sound disappointed.

Heero shrugged. "She's still thinking about it. She said she wants me at the shuttle port tomorrow morning early though, so-"

"You're not going alone!"

"I doubt it. It's not a solo mission. I-" Someone put their head through the door and dragged Heero off for one more 'important interrogation', leaving me fuming and worried and still lacking anything like decent tea.

The assistant approached me as I returned to my desk with some watery coffee, her face stiff and eyes a bit defensive.

"What?" I snapped.

"Um..." She licked her lips and looked down at her notepad. "Someone tried to reach you a couple of times and left a message two hours ago. Er...a Sally Po, from the Beijing Institute of-"

"I know her." Sally had tried to call? Damn! I'd assumed that if it were really urgent she'd have left me a more detailed explanation in her mails, something that would justify me calling Earth from the office. "What's the message?"

"Well..." The assistant licked her lips again. "She, er, what she _meant_ to say was-"

"Meant? What are you talking about!" I snapped, temper flaring as I tried to imagine what could be serious enough for an Earth to L2 call. "Give me her message word for word!"

The assistant flinched and then, with a slightly resentful look and in a monotone, said: "Tell him I'm at home, and tell him, Wufei, you little rat, if you don't call me this minute and tell me absolutely everything I will never speak to you again."

She turned on her heels and left me open-mouthed in the middle of the office.

It took me a minute to get my composure back. I had my hand on the phone when I glanced at the time and cursed. It was two in the morning in Beijing. Sally would probably not want to be bothered at this time, and her husband certainly not. From the sound of the message - I flushed - I doubted it was urgent. I'd call her later. And chew her out thoroughly!

 

 

It was eleven at night when we drove through the quiet streets, the artificial light of the colony long extinguished. Heero and Duo were bickering aimlessly about which take-out to have that night, before concluding tiredly that there was only one open nearby at this time anyway.

I recognized the street Duo had turned into. "Are we near your place?"

"Yes. Tim's All-Night Deep-Fried Delights is two blocks from the house."

"Could you drop me off? And may I use your phone for an Earth call? I'll reimburse the expense."

"Feiiii," Duo muttered, tired eyes catching mine in the rear-view mirror. "You don't have to- oh, I'm not going to argue." He must be really exhausted, I mused. "Go ahead. What should we order for you?"

"Anything that has less than fifty percent saturated fats is fine by me. Vitamins optional."

"Picky..."

"We normally eat better than this," Heero said dully. "But we're-"

"Too busy, I know." I made the same excuse myself on many a mission. Our lifestyles were active enough where it wouldn't harm us right away, and we'd never been good at thinking about the distant future of our mid-thirties where hardened arteries would become a factor. Suddenly I was thinking about those things though. One more side-effect of this brain-fever called love. We might break up next month, yet I was worrying about our state of health when we were old men together. Maybe when I called Sally, she could recommend a good nutritionist. Or possibly a psychiatrist, I corrected myself as Duo dropped me off.

I put my borrowed keys in the jam jar near the door and switched on the lights, making my way across to the study. And whipped out my gun as I registered a figure sitting on my bed.

He waited quietly while I stared, and waited some more until I jerked the gun away and re-holstered it.

"Quatre," I said, finally finding my voice. "What are you doing here?"

He was sitting poised on the edge of my bed as if it were an executive chair. He looked at me and smiled slightly.

"I don't know, Chang, you tell me."

"What?" I said weakly. This was turning out to be the second longest day of my life, and the longest had only been seventy two hours ago.

Quatre stood up in a fluid movement. He was wearing a suit, though his tie was loosened and he was looking rumpled. He still had the assured bearing of a diplomat. Except for the smile. It wasn't his usual warm expression. His lips were slightly curved upward and his blue eyes were focused on a point three inches behind the back of my head. I felt myself tense up instinctively. Something was wrong.

"I said, you tell me what I'm doing here. Please." He said it with that same strange calm that seemed to spread around him like quicksand.

"I...how the hell am I supposed to know- how did you get into this house?"

"Oh that? Heero gave me a key months ago, in case something happened to either him or Duo. I think I'm entitled to use it in these circumstances. And to sit down, seeing that I've been rushed from pillar to post today on a factory visit, before receiving a couple of interesting phone calls that made me miss my shuttle back to L4, lose Rashid and his men and hitch a ride on a freighter to this colony, spending three hours in a greasy cabin with a very nice gentleman named, if I'm not mistaken, Crusher."

I stared at him as if he'd gone - ...suddenly I remembered the way Heero and Trowa had described their meeting with Quatre after he'd been exposed to the Zero system. I thought I knew what they meant now. Quatre was someone I respected as my one-time tactical leader, a brilliant mind and a fierce if compassionate warrior. I had no particular wish to get on his wrong side. But now I had a feeling I was so far on his wrong side I was about to fall off the edge of the solar system.

"Let's get to the heart of the matter, shall we?" he said with that same dreamy voice. "The phone calls. One was from Sally, who is very mad at you."

"Sally?" I growled. "She called you?! What's gotten into the woman!"

Quatre tsk-ed. His eyes never left mine. "She's always taken a close interest in your life and your friends, Chang. She didn't appreciate not knowing anything about either when getting a phone call from an old acquaintance of hers earlier today. This lady used to work in the Chinese resistance, but she's now an archivist for the L2 Preventers. She said she recognized you today as the nice young man who saved her resistance cell back then, but unfortunately when she'd tried to approach you to thank you, she interrupted you while you were with Duo Maxwell." Quatre's intelligent eye noticed the flinch that nearly knocked me off my feet.

"Actually I think she used the words 'passionate clench'," Quatre added with a small smile, revealing a streak of sadism that I had not known existed in his nature.

"Ah," I said, stopping the flush from engulfing me by sheer strength of will.

"Yes, ah indeed. Sally wants to drag you over red-hot coals until you give her all the details. Since she couldn't get a hold of you, she called me to see if I knew anything about this."

My lips formed a silent snarl. Discreet, woman! Quatre was the one every one went to for news, who kept us all aware of what the others were doing. At this rate, was there anyone in the Earth Sphere who didn't know about this?

"Now we get to the interesting part. The second phone call." Quatre's eyes became dreamy. He took two slow steps in my direction and all my warrior instincts warned me to take two steps back.

"It arrived ten minutes after that one. Trowa called. He said he had the most surprising news. I said I had too. He said he'd go first because he doubted I could top his. He said Une had yanked him from his leave on L4 to assign him to partner Heero in Antarctica. Une complained to him that she had wanted to send you with Heero, but regulations said she couldn't send an involved couple. I think she assumed Trowa already knew."

I tried to say something, but the words stuck in my throat.

"Trowa was certainly not disappointed by the amount of surprise I displayed at the news!" Quatre informed me cheerfully while taking another step forward. "I hung up on him rather abruptly at that point, I'm afraid. And I came here, to the home of two of my very best friends - two very strong, resilient but emotionally vulnerable friends who I happen to know like you a lot - to see just what is going on.

"So tell me, Chang, what _am_ I doing here? Am I here to congratulate you for finally removing your blinders and going out with one of my best friends, or am I here to kick your ass for toying with two of them?"

He said it with that small half-smile and dreamy eyes. I knew I could take Quatre down barehanded in a straightforward fight. I knew that a fight with Quatre when he had something dear to his heart to protect would not be straightforward at all.

At that point the door banged open behind me, aging me about ten years.

"We're ho-... Quatre?! What a surprise!" Duo dropped take-out carelessly on the side table and ran towards Quatre.

I reacted entirely on instinct. Of course on reflection I would know that Quatre would never harm Duo - he was only mad at me, after all - but my body reacted for me. My arms shot out and I yanked Duo back into them. No way was I going to let him go near that dangerous half smile.

Duo squawked and caught himself on my shoulders, then stared at me, at Quatre - whose eyebrow had shot up - and then at Heero who took a half step that placed him between me and pilot 04. He'd picked up on the tension in the room.

"So...you're with Duo, I take it?" Quatre said, noting our various poses. "Did Trowa get it wrong?"

"Un," I said.

Quatre was an empath. He took a second look at Heero's defensive pose and the protective feelings he was probably emanating towards both Duo and myself, and his second eyebrow shot up as well.

"What's going on here?!"

Heero frowned and crossed his arms. I fished around for my voice, then gave up. Duo grinned uncertainly and said: "Well...we sorta agreed to-...a threesome?"

Quatre stared at us for ten long seconds. Then he rubbed his face slowly. "Threesome. Of course," he muttered sardonically. "Now why didn't I think of that."

He lifted his head to glare at us, but it was a normal look now. "You really had to make things complicated, didn't you? Well, I must say, this is quite a relief."

"Relief?" Duo started.

"God knows what I would have done with whoever Wufei left out if he'd chosen one of you. That was the other reason I showed up in person," Quatre said with a sudden tired smile. "Right. Well now that that's settled, I'll wish you guys good luck - you'll need it - and take my leave."

"You can stay here tonight," Heero offered quietly, not particularly surprised or off-balance by any of this. I rather envied him at that point.

"I'd love to, trust me." Quatre leered in a way I'd not thought him capable of. Duo chortled and I blushed, to my infinite shame. "But I have a board meeting tomorrow - no, scratch that, I have something else to do tomorrow. But either way I have to get back to earth tonight. If I hurry, I will catch Crusher before his freighter leaves on his planet-side run." He started to saunter out the door, an amused smile on his face.

"There are earth shuttles departing all night, Winner," I said, finally finding my voice again. "You don't have to, er-"

"Oh, well, I get tired of being pestered by stewards pressing me with champagne and shuttle food every hour in business class, and Mr Crusher's conversation is so much more interesting than the average Fortune 500 who normally share the cabin with me. Besides, Crusher can drop me off at the Antarctica base if I get Une to wave formalities with earth customs-"

"Antarctica?" I stared into blue eyes as he glanced back.

"I'm due a break from the running of WEI, and Trowa needs a partner for the mission. It'll be a kick." The way he was grinning indicated he meant that. Once a Gundam pilot...

This meant that Heero didn't have to leave. I was sure Quatre would remember to call Une and get her to agree to this and cancel his orders. I gave Quatre a look of gratitude which he shrugged off. I think this was in the nature of an apology to me, for assuming I was toying with two people we both loved and respected.

Duo and Heero both tried to say something, but Quatre blithely ignored them. He gave us one last look, rolled his eyes upward in mock exasperation and left, muttering something about 'three lucky bastards'.

 

 

I waited until Heero and Duo fell asleep before extricating myself from the tangle of limbs. We'd not even considered sleeping in separate beds that night. I was beginning to worry about going back to earth on Monday and trying to sleep without the gentle harmony of their breathing and their warmth by my side.

I crept into the study and got Une out of bed to confirm, rather grumpily, that she no longer needed Heero in Antarctica. Then I placed the other call I owed before I could finally call this never-ending day complete.

"It's six in the bloody morning this better be important- Hello?"

"Sally?"

The vid screen switched on to reveal a rumpled doctor.

"Wufei! Finally! What the hell is this I hear, is it true, how long has this been going on and why didn't you tell me, you little bastard?"

"I-"

"For that matter you never told me you liked guys! I'd have had a better chance at matching you up with someone if you'd told me that little detail, Chang!"

"Sal-"

"But Duo! That's quite a catch! Wow, congratulations! It's true, right?"

"Ye-"

"Knew it! Oh I'm so happy for you! And so mad too, by the way. Why didn't you tell me? You didn't tell anybody, even Quatre didn't know."

"About that-" I growled.

"You really should tell him, you know. There's some confusion there. He called me back thirty minutes after I called him, he was asking me - get this - he was asking me if I hadn't gotten the wrong guy! He asked me if it wasn't Heero you were going out with." Sally laughed in her pleasant, gentle way. "As if anyone could confuse Heero and Duo! My friend works with them both, she knew exactly who you were - ah, entertaining, let's say, in her Archives."

"Sally."

"Anyway, the idea of you and Heero-...he's a nice boy, but so single-minded, stubborn and humorless. You'd have better luck dating his Gundam. Er..." Sally stared at the hand I'd lifted admonishingly.

"Sally, I _am_ with Heero, please don't talk about my boyfriend like that."

Sally's jaw dropped. "Oh! Oh?...Oh...Did Jing-La get it wrong then? Man, I'll strangle the little- Sorry, Wufei." Sally looked more teasing and maternal than apologetic, though. "You know I like Heero. He saved us all from war and destruction, twice, you can't get much better as a reference. He _is_ very serious, and his death-scowls are just about as efficient as his bullets, but he's a wonderful young man. Come to think of it, you two do have a lot in common." Sally smirked. "Yes, I think you two will be great together. Duo...well Duo's relentless cheerfulness would be trying for you after awhile, and he - er..." Sally stared again at my raised hand.

"Sally, I am also with Duo, so the same thing goes, please be nice about him."

Sally cocked her head, then turned away and the image on the vid jumped as she fiddled with something.

"Sorry Wufei, this stupid thing is acting up again. Earth-colony communication isn't very clear at the best of times. What was that you said about Duo?"

"Sally?"

"Hmm?"

I leaned back in the chair, clasped my hands and suppressed my smirk.

"Are you sitting down?"


	3. 7 Ways to Say...

"I... love you."

I winced. This time I hadn't scowled. I'd looked like I'd swallowed a live minnow instead.

"I love you."

No, I hadn't been paying attention. I had just said the words without thinking. Onyx eyes glared at me reprovingly.

"I l-love- dammit!"

My cheeks were dusky with embarrassment. And self-directed contempt.

"I love you," I muttered. In the mirror, lips barely moved and eyes looked sullen. Wonderful.

I could say the words - I could recite the collected works of Li Bai, so saying three little words was hardly a challenge. I could say them just fine until I imagined myself saying them to two sets of blue eyes, similar yet so different, looking at me expectantly. Then I choked. I was practicing in front of a mirror - to my eternal shame, but at this point I had several eternities' worth of embarrassment beneath my belt so I'd stopped counting. I'd said I loved them all of two times, and I'd choked and stuttered on each occasion. They knew how I felt, of course. Probably. I just...well I wanted to be sure; in view of the misunderstandings that had started our relationship on an almost desperate footing, and left me cold and bleeding in a police station at three in the morning. Words were obviously important. We had agreed - rule number one! - that we had to communicate. So...

"I-...love..."

I leaned my head against the mirror and sighed. I felt stupid and callow and the words sounded empty and trite. I was a pretty useless boyfriend.

I sighed and glanced at the mirror again. The shower was running in the background to cover the sound of my voice since Heero and Duo were in the kitchen area, finishing their breakfast. A veil of moisture hid my writhing from my sight. I wiped it from the mirror and looked into two unhappy eyes. My hair was loose and hanging like a damp curtain around my ears and my mouth was down-turned in an uncharacteristic expression of pain. Normally I get mad, not sad, but that would be counter productive here.

"Get your head straight, Chang," I ordered the wimp in front of me. "It's not easy, but it's a worthy goal and you dishonor them and yourself by your failures. You owe it to them to be clear and resolute, and it really shouldn't be this difficult. Remember the words of Confucius. 'A heart set on love will do no wrong.'"

"Oh very good," the image in the mirror immediately replied with a well-known look of cold disdain. "If Confucius had had the kind of week I'd had, had wound up with two amazing men as his lovers, but had the disposition of a dragon with its tail in a splint and the tongue to match, he'd have come up with a whole new set of sayings, none of them printable."

"You're making excuses, Chang," I snapped. "And leave Confucius out of this," I added. "He's not to blame for your inability to express yourself."

"You're the one who brought him up," my reflection pointed out. "Always hiding behind the scholar's intellect or the warrior's anger."

"Maybe I'm not hiding," I muttered, eyes dropping to the sink. "Maybe that's all there is..."

There was no snappy comeback.

"I... love... them..." I whispered. I could feel myself flushing even as I said it and I knew my face was setting in its usual cold mask, a refuge and a rampart and a prison.

When I'd woken up a few days ago with their warmth and strength pressed against me, I'd made a solemn vow. I would try to be worthy of them, I would give them all that I was and hope, pray, that that would be enough. And then I let them leave that morning without even once telling them that I loved them. The rest of that episode made me wince with embarrassment - I swear I still saw that old guy and his dog every time I stuck my head out the door; I think he's about ready to set up a booth and sell tickets. But at least I'd said it that day. Since then, though, we'd been busy, and distracted, and I...

I tried to remember the emotions I'd felt in the car that day and found myself smiling despite everything. The warm look in their eyes...well, Duo's eyes, because Heero looked like he expected me to have convulsions at that point. But even Heero had said he loved me, with some hesitation granted but coming from him...Agh. My thoughts spiraled like water down the drain.

"Fei? You okay in there?"

I snapped to attention, face scarlet in the fogged mirror. "Fine! I'm fine! Er, coming." I turned off the shower and finished getting dressed.

I had to tell them. It would be some small and humble thanks for the great gift they had given me. Their love, their companionship. I gave the mirror one last glare - it's a wonder it didn't splinter - and marched out of the bathroom.

"Heero? Duo? I -"

Two pairs of eyes glanced up in my direction. Duo was just moving towards the sink where Heero had started washing the dishes. The colony's artificial light clashed with the neon in the kitchen area, but I could swear they were haloed in sunshine. They were in uniform, all firm muscles yet graceful gestures, power and poise, the beauty of warriors. Duo's braid was swinging from the motion of turning around to catch what I had to say, and Heero leaned forward to see around his friend, head tilted and mesmerizing blue eyes serious and attentive.

"I'll help you with that," I said, and Confucius must have forgiven me and given me a hand from beyond the grave because it didn't sound like it was being choked out of me, though it was pitched slightly lower than usual.

I was subjected to two quizzical looks - when your life depends on small details, you tend not to let them pass by unnoticed - but they decided not to ask me why I sounded like I had a sore throat, or why my hair was already half dry if I'd just come out of the shower. Damn but I did love them. I just wish I could say it without making a fool of myself, say it in a way that truly expressed what I meant.

"So what are we doing today?" I asked, taking the dishcloth from Duo so he could put away the breakfast things.

"We still have some things to work-"

"I meant after that," I interrupted Heero's careful words, trying to avoid another clash.

We'd been working all out for the past two days, from early morning to practically midnight, trying to clear out the gunrunner case. It looked like we'd be working over the weekend as well, but Duo had put his foot down yesterday, on Friday morning.

I could see his point of view. We were all tired, tense, and we'd started to sink into the silence that sheltered us and let us garner our reserves for our mission. Heero and I were so used to this we barely noticed. Duo was the one who shook it off and pointed out I had to leave on Monday, and it might be quite awhile before we could be together again. Besides, we needed the break.

Heero had started to argue, and of course I understood his point of view as well. These men we were putting away had threatened the peace we'd worked so hard for. We had, between the three of us, killed a frightening number of people for it. Whatever our justifications, their eyes were on us at all times, demanding we make their sacrifice worthwhile. Heero felt it even more than we did. This was also his life's mission, his reason for being.

I could see the coming chain of events as clearly as if I'd been stuffed into the Zero system; they were both tired, moody from pushing paper and interrogating scum, and though they worked together well, on some points they were very different and equally as stubborn. I could see the argument raising its ugly head even before Heero scowled and Duo opened his mouth again, and I leapt in with a diplomacy I hadn't thought I'd possessed.

"We do need to clear up some of the more essential leads before I leave," I said quickly while I put a hand on Duo's waist and pinched innocently before he could protest; his quick mouth lost his words in a gasp. "But we can do that Saturday and Sunday mornings. We should take a time out on the afternoons. It would help us maintain our efficiency and focus," I'd hastily added in Heero's direction to forestall the death glare.

Two sets of eyes swung on me. There was a moment of tense silence and I wondered if I'd just buttered myself with mustard and stepped between two tigers. Then they glanced at each other and the atmosphere relaxed.

"That would be acceptable," Heero said. He suddenly sounded subdued and hesitant. I winced as I could almost hear his mental gears grind as they shifted from soldier to lover. Duo took it in stride though, as always.

"Fantastic idea, Fei! That leaves us Saturday afternoon, Saturday evening and Sunday afternoon. Then you'll be packing to leave early on Monday. So that's perfect! Which do you want, Heero?"

"Want?" Heero started, dragged from his thoughts.

"Yeah, when do you want to go out with Fei? I'm good any of those times."

"Go where?" Heero crossed his arms and stared at Duo.

"Anywhere. On a date, moron. You do remember he's your boyfriend, right?" Duo snickered. "So which do you want? Oh, Sunday we can do something the three of us just before he leaves, so it's between Saturday afternoon and evening. Let's toss. I gotta coin somewhere-"

"Evening."

Duo glanced up, hand still fishing around his back pocket. "You sure?"

"Yes. Evening. Please."

Duo and I blinked at that. Heero's expression had closed and he was wearing the familiar mask.

I'd wanted to sit down and peel that look off of his face and see what lay beneath it, but we had a full day ahead of us, and Duo, not all that intrigued by what he saw as Heero's usual single-minded attitude towards work, life and everything, hustled us out the door. He didn't want Friday's workload to accidentally extend beyond Saturday morning. He stuffed us into the car and left in a roar of engines, cheerfully waving to the old creep and his dog who'd almost been flattened as he barrelled out of the garage.

We all worked so efficiently that day that Saturday arrived with an almost less-than-manic workload. It allowed my boyfriends to linger over breakfast while I lingered in front of the mirror, trying not to bash my head against it as I decided that, our schedules being less hectic, I needed to attend to this growing relationship, and realized I could still barely acknowledge it out loud.

Saturday morning passed quickly and Duo dragged us away from our desks at one second past noon, insisting we drive home to eat before Une's dogs could hunt us down and give us more work. After that week's intense schedule, the sudden freedom before us made us dizzy. We actually stopped and bought some fresh supplies and made lunch. Steaks and salad and a very small kitchen; numerous excuses to 'accidentally' bump into each other or press up and reach around a waist or a shoulder to grab something that would just be a bit too hard to get in any other way...

I'd almost forgotten the afternoon's activities. I only remembered when Duo grabbed my plate even as I took the last forkful of salad from it, and then went to hover over Heero's shoulder.

"I'll do the dishes, Duo. You two go," Heero said quietly as he finished his lunch.

"Nah buddy, I can-"

"Go."

"Okay!"

Duo gave me a big wide grin and I smiled hesitantly in turn. Right, I had a date. A date with Duo. My first date, too.

I was at a loss what to expect. I wasn't so isolated from modern living that I didn't know what a date normally entailed. Normal as in, between a boy and a girl. What did two men get up to on a date? Duo evaded all my tentative questions with a 'wait-and-see' while we changed into casual dress.

I'd taken time to buy a spare outfit to replace my bloodied one. As I pulled on my pants, tank-top and Chinese tunic - I'd given up the white of mourning for red and black, but I still kept to the style of my clan - I realized I was rather looking forward to this, even though Duo's idea of fun was bound to be loud and frantic. He'd certainly dragged me to some odd things when we'd been undercover at the holiday resort on L4. But even though I'd not admitted it at the time, I had enjoyed being with him, even as a friend. This time we were going as boyfriends, so I was ready to bet the venue would also be rich in opportunity for physical contact. An action movie, maybe, or a concert full of violent music. If Duo took the first step, it would help me express myself, help me to actually put my feelings into words. At least Duo would take it well - hell he was probably expecting some flirting. It'd be a dry-run for Heero later; it would be harder to be spontaneous and natural with that serious expression and deep blue eyes watching me, and I didn't want to choke up in front of him; he'd think I was suffering from a fever again.

Duo drove the car to the end of the road and braked for the stop sign. I found myself a few feet away from the old man walking his dog again. I resisted the urge to pinch myself and tried to ignore the poached-egg stares of the two; they were beginning to feature in my worst recurring nightmare. It took some effort. I shifted in my seat, and realized Duo wasn't moving forward and his concentration didn't seem to be on the road.

"Duo? What-"

"Just a sec."

"What are we waiting for?"

"Probably nothing but - oh. Yep, just as I thought. There goes one sad bastard." Duo sounded a bit subdued though. I followed the direction of his gaze and looked in the rear-view mirror. I could see Heero's distant figure leave the house, turn at the gate and head towards the bus stop at the other end of the road.

"What shall we do, Fei?" Duo looked uncertain as he glanced at me then back at the figure in the mirror. "Shall we grab him and take him with us? I can always get an extra ticket. He may not like it, but I'm damned if I'm letting him work himself to death while we-"

"No."

"Hey, I don't mind. We'll have other occasions to-"

"No. First of all, I mind. This is our time together, and Heero agreed." I spoke quietly and firmly so that he didn't think he could wheedle me out of my decision. "Second...if Heero has decided to go and work, that's what he wants to do and-"

"But Fei we've been working like maniacs all week! Mr Gundanium-between-the-ears needs a life, bad! I-"

"Duo."

"But-"

"No, Duo." I knew it was one of Duo's goals in life to get Heero to have some fun even if he had to stuff it down his throat with a broom handle, but I could predict the kneejerk reaction this would evoke with Heero.

I put my hand on his when I saw the hurt in his eyes. "You've known him for so long now that you have to realize you can't force him to embrace life like you do. It doesn't work like that."

"But I got to try," Duo grumbled. "I don't want his only hobby to be finding new and interesting ways of getting himself killed." He tried to look like he was joking, but I knew his mask as well as Heero's.

"He's already not like that anymore, Duo. You had a lot to do with that already, as did Relena, and peace, and his job with the Preventers, and that's why, if he wants to work there now -"

"He's a big boy and knows what he wants to do, I get it." A pair of blue eyes caught mine and the smile was small but straightforward. "I'm counting on you to get him to want more in the future. Right? That's your job too now."

"Don't worry." I brushed his bangs from his eyes and let my fingers linger on his cheek for an instant. "If he tries to work this evening, then he and I will definitely have words."

"Good. Well let's motor, don't want to be late. Right, Fei? Um, why you glaring at that old guy and his pooch?"

"No matter. Just drive."

 

 

I breathed again and nodded in approval as the man hit the ground with a resounding thump. A ripple of noise ran through the small crowd around the arena as everyone glanced at the referee, and then broke into applause as he declared a winner.

I leaned back in my seat with a smile as the next challengers stood forward and bowed. I glanced at Duo who had put his chin in his hand, eyes fixed on the mat. He'd surprised me yet again. I hadn't known what to expect for a date - and I admit I had been bracing for the worst. I still couldn't quite believe we'd ended up in a stadium hosting the all-colonies martial arts symposium.

Since these weren't the finals yet, the small stadium was half empty. We sat far away from other spectators in the last row of seats, keeping our backs to the wall out of old habit.

Duo clapped and whistled good-humouredly as the last match was decided, then leaned back. There were entertainment and martial arts displays between the division matches, pupils from local schools showing off their skills. As they gathered in the arena, Duo glanced around.

"I thought there'd be more people here. If I'd known it would be this empty, I would have taken Heero along after all."

I glanced around too. Heero didn't like big crowds, a leftover from former days. But most of the spectators were groups from other local schools come to watch the show, and friends and family, all seated close to the mats. Our area was quite deserted. He would have been okay.

In fact this was more something I could better imagine doing with Heero than Duo. We were seated chastely and companionably side by side under the harsh fluorescent lights of the gymnasium.

The last match was called and the ranks and the next day's finals announced. Duo and I stayed seated as most of the spectators filed out, avoiding the press of bodies and waiting until we could leave without being surrounded.

Duo leaned back in his chair and stretched. "I'm up for coffee and something disgustingly sweet before we head home! How about you, Fei?"

"Sure. I'm buying. No arguments, Duo, you bought the tickets. When did you get them by the way?"

"Oh, yesterday at lunch time. I saw this was going on this week and thought you'd like it."

I turned towards him fully in the plastic seat. "I did. I really enjoyed myself. Thank you, Duo."

He blinked and smiled, looking quite pleased with himself. "Cool!" He jumped to his feet and took a couple of steps towards the exit. I followed more slowly.

"Did you like it?" I asked, hesitantly.

"Me? Of course! That was awesome! I can't believe that old guy who did the demo during one of the breaks - what did they say he was, seventy-nine? He's more limber than I am, for chrissakes! Gotta start doing that Tai Chi. Say, can you teach me?"

"I can show you some forms." I smiled as I followed him. There were only a few groups of people left, mainly students from local dojos discussing the results or talking to some of the competitors. We made our way down to the ring to head towards the exit. I brought my mind back from thinking about teaching Duo Tai Chi to my original concern.

"I really did like this, Duo," I said to establish that fact without a doubt. "But I hope you didn't...weren't you thinking of something a bit more...well, entertaining for our date?"

Duo stopped walking and turned towards me, uncertain. "Why, did you...want-"

"I enjoyed this," I said firmly, stopping close to him and looking him straight in the eye. "And I could see you did too, but I don't expect you to cater to my taste alone. We can also go to the movies or out to eat or-" I took a deep breath then made a show of rolling my eyes "- I'll even concede an amusement arcade or a funfair as a once in a lifetime event." Duo snickered at my theatrical reluctance.

"Well sure, Fei, I guess we can do that next time, if you think you wanna. I assumed it wasn't your sort of thing." He looked a bit puzzled.

"You're my sort of thing, Duo," I said softly. "I always have fun with you, even if it's not something I would ever do on my own."

He smiled and I swear his cheeks grew a little pink. "Why, Mr Chang, that was the nicest thing you've ever said to me!" He was joking but it made me wince inside. He was probably right. I was so caught up with the thought and the little prickles of guilt that I almost missed the abortive poking gesture he gave me to accompany the words; the hand was quickly snatched back.

"Duo, why aren't you touching me?" My surprise and concern at that quick withdrawal prompted me to speak before my reserve could wonder if this was a polite or appropriate question.

"Say what?!" Duo did a double take, almost tripping over the small step up to the arena.

"When we're at home - or even when we were undercover and just friends at that L4 resort, you were always touching me. Casually, but you're always grabbing people. You're a tactile person. You've not done that once this afternoon."

"I - no? Oh, well...didn't think you'd want to." Duo looked completely nonplussed. "In public and all."

"Public?"

"Yeah. Heero explained this to me way back already. When I asked him why he threatened to break my neck whenever I gave him a hug. I gathered a lotta Asian cultures frown on showing affection in public. And I don't want you to be ashamed of being seen with me. I know-... well, I don't mind, I like you the way you are."

"That's good," I said tightly. "It's true that I'm reserved, easily embarrassed and flustered, and not openly affectionate. But Duo..."

"Yeah?" Wide blue eyes plunged into mine.

I took half a step forward and he started back, his heels bumping against the small step leading to the arena. He glanced around in surprise and I took the opportunity of slipping my arms around his waist and moving right up against him, and pressing our lips together. He made a 'Mf!' noise against my mouth and his hands fisted against my chest in surprise.

I broke the kiss but I kept our faces close together, ignoring anyone who might be around, watching us. "But Duo, I don't want you to stop being yourself either. And as long as I'm with you -" I gave him a quick kiss, short and sweet "- I will never be ashamed of this. Even in public."

His eyes were wide with surprise. Being Duo, he was only speechless for a few seconds.

"Okay, ashamed wasn't the word I meant to use," he whispered, ducking his head a bit and watching me through his lashes.

"Make sure that wasn't the word you had in mind either, Maxwell," I murmured back. "In fact I want you to erase that word from your vocabulary. It doesn't belong there." I knew that in the past I'd made a fuss about him being a loud-mouthed idiot with no dignity, so I thought - hoped almost - that this was my fault and my words and actions could now set that right. But...I had a feeling that word might have crept up from someplace deeper from within his soul than simply his fear of embarrassing me. I carefully filed that thought away for future contemplation. I wouldn't be much of a boyfriend - or even a friend - if I didn't try to chase that piece of darkness from those bright blue eyes.

"Well...to get back to what I actually meant to say, Fei..." His breath was caressing my lower lip and making my heart pulsate. "I don't want you to - I mean, I don't want to make you feel embarrassed either. Though granted, right now you're more forward than I am. But I can't help feeling-" his mouth brushed mine lighter than a feather, and his arms were finally curling around my waist making my whole body quiver in a rather distracting way "- that maybe you're twisting your own arm here."

"Only because the sight of an unusually subdued Duo Maxwell is scaring me badly," I said softly, falling back on our usual banter by habit. "But seriously Duo...if I feel uncomfortable with anything, I will tell you."

"Rule number one, eh?"

"Yes. I -"

We both tensed unconsciously as we heard the steps come near us and we paused in unspoken accord to let the spectators pass. My back was turned to the rest of the stadium and I was pressing Duo up against the edge of the arena. I saw his eyes twitch from mine and widen in warning, and I managed to twist around in time to dodge the shove. My movements pushed Duo back though, and I heard him let himself fall. This allowed him to roll away and come up in a defensive crouch away from the aggressor, whereas I was now pressed back against the steps and slightly off balance. The position made my reflexes scream and the boy who'd tried to shove me didn't know how lucky he was that I had Duo at my back, giving me enough reassurance that I didn't lash out automatically.

The boy - he was probably around my age - took half a step back and seemed to expect me to say something. I was too busy weighing the tactical situation; he had five friends with him, in a loose half-circle around us. They all wore the same t-shirt, with the name of a martial arts club on it. The rest of the stadium had emptied and we were apparently alone. I took a blind step back, getting onto the fighting mat and giving myself some room.

The young men seemed surprised by our silence. Then the leader sneered.

"Oh, I'm sorry, it seems I bumped into you. Your boyfriend's not hurt is he?"

Duo could fall from a height of three stories and walk away, so I wasn't too worried about him.

"What do you want, fellas?" Duo's voice was neutral behind me.

The young man dropped the pretence, if that is what it was, that the shove had been accidental. He scowled and glanced around him for support; typical pack mentality I found myself thinking, and planning a strategic strike that would take him down first and demoralize the others. It was an old reflex and I throttled it quickly.

"What we want?" The others were gathering nearer. "We think you two queers should show some respect to the arts that were practiced here today. You should have your perverted little fun elsewhere." He spoke in a more cultured tone than I'd expected, these weren't thugs, they - what did he say?!

It took me a moment to realize what the problem was, strangely enough. I had been a murderer, a terrorist, I was now a Preventer and involved in a rather unusual romantic relationship. There were so many better reasons to be the brunt of aggression, that that one had not immediately occurred to me. But it was true that for many people, especially on L2, same-sex couples were enough of a sore point.

I could feel Duo's anger radiating behind me. I was angry too, but it fused with a mess of emotions in me, one of which was embarrassment. Damn, I'd almost instinctively apologized. A part of me did believe I might have gone too far in public. Of course, after that conversation with Duo, I'd have subjected myself to the full OZ treatment including execution rather than say anything about it. Besides, my display of affection wasn't what was bothering these creeps, and I was not going to apologize for loving Duo just because he was a man. Time to get out of here before I did something I'd _not_ regret.

"No disrespect was intended. We'll leave," I said, schooling my voice to Heero-neutral. I took another step away before turning around, knowing Duo was watching my back. The arena was open, so we could cut across it and leave another way.

There was a rustle of hesitation behind me then the leader said: "Just a minute!" Funny, I'd been ready to bet it wasn't going to be that easy.

Another glance around at his cronies before he stepped onto the mat after me. I despise weakness and cowardice, and a mob embodies both. A couple of them looked hesitant, but they followed a few feet behind their leader, reassured by their numbers and their presumed martial skills.

"We think you should apologize. To us and to the tatami you dishonored with your lewd little show."

"They stood on it without bowing, too. And they're not barefoot," another of the hyenas pointed out. He didn't even have the guts to address us. I felt soiled just being in their presence. I almost preferred the company of the killers we'd been interrogating this morning, and these were the people we were protecting when we'd done that. Some of the anger that had burned during Mariameia's uprising flickered in me still and I ruthlessly crushed it. I was better than that now.

"I'm sorry for walking on the tatami without removing my shoes," I said with a minimal head movement towards the center of the mat. I felt that I could apologize for that at least, and I caught a similar movement from Duo out of the corner of my eye. Then I turned away again and started walking, measuring the distance to the door with my eyes. Duo took two steps back without turning, keeping a careful eye on the mob.

"Not so fast!"

"Yeah!"

"-make them kneel and bow."

"Yeah good idea!"

"-son of a bitch shouldn't-"

Duo and I exchanged a resigned look.

 

 

"I'm sorry." Forehead pressed against the tatami, the words came out muffled.

"Duo," I supplied helpfully. "His name is Duo."

"...I'm..."

I gave the arm I was twisting a warning twitch as I felt the head I was pressing down to the mat squirm in protest.

"Sorry Duo," the boy muttered sullenly.

"Apology accepted," Duo grinned and waved his left hand magnanimously. His right hand held the largest attacker in a thumb lock on his knees. Another boy was flat on his back at Duo's feet; unharmed. They hadn't been much of a threat. Duo's boot was pressed warningly against the boy's crotch and he was very, very still. The other three who'd hung back from the start, were several feet away, looking flabbergasted and unsure of how to deal with the situation.

"I would normally have you express your regret for your insult to our respective ancestors as well -"

"In my case that'd be difficult," Duo snorted.

"- but I'll let you off once you've apologized to me and to the tatami you dishonoured with your despicable conduct," I finished smoothly.

"...sorry..."

"Yeah, you're just lucky our pal isn't with us. He gets right uptight about people disturbing the peace." Duo leered, eyes hard. "And he's never learned to pull his punches, even with his mates."

"Now I want you all to disappear," I said softly, eyes spearing them one after the other. "Or I'll contact the master of your club and tell him his pupils are dishonorable dogs."

"Who fight like kindergartners!" Duo added with a snicker, lifting his foot and nudging the boy up. He kept the lock on the other and I didn't release the leader until the others had stumbled half way to the exit and paused. Then we let them run off, ignoring the muttered curses and black looks tempered with fear and humiliation.

We waited a few minutes then headed out the back exit, all senses alert. We were moving like soldiers and I think we both realized it at the same time.

Duo laughed ruefully and scratched his nose. "Man, Fei, I have the worst luck each time I get you to myself. I'm beginning to think cupid has it in for m-hey!"

I didn't relinquish the hold on his neck even though I continued walking; he stumbled after me, cursing and chuckling.

"Stop moping," I told him sternly, ignoring his muffled protest. "I have nothing to complain about. We had an exciting afternoon, and a little workout-"

"Very little," Duo interrupted, wiggling free. I managed to keep my hold around his shoulders though, and slid my arm so that I clasped him as we were walking side by side.

"Okay, a pitiful workout," I conceded, "but it's given me a bit of appetite. Didn't someone mention coffee and a snack?"

"Well that was the plan." Finally Duo's arm slipped around my waist and held me closer as we walked.

"Good plan. You're a very good date, Duo."

The arm around me squeezed briefly and his voice was soft in my ear. "Glad you think so, love."

 

 

The colony's artificial afternoon was waning as we made our way home. We were walking in our own light though; my reserve had re-established itself fairly quickly, and Duo had felt it and broken our hold without a fuss, but we still managed to touch regularly while having our coffee and on the way home.

We hesitated on the doorstep. Part of me didn't want to give up this closeness, this deep intimacy that we were sharing. But I keenly felt how excluded Heero would believe himself to be if we brought this home with us. We paused, suddenly measuring just how difficult the balance was in this relationship. Maybe one day it would come naturally, we could share and belong, all three of us without having to change mental gears or cut one off to let the other in. But right now it was hard. I reminded myself that Heero didn't deserve to feel the awkwardness that was trying to settle between us, especially as he'd probably take the blame for it on his own shoulders. I shook myself and caught Duo's smile. Group dynamics were second nature to us after spending time in combat situations in a small unit. We knew where the dangers were, and we could hopefully avoid them. 'Us' was what mattered, the most important part. I gave Duo a quick, admiring kiss, as I honestly didn't know if I would have the strength of mind and heart to do what he and Heero were doing if I were in their shoes.

"Well that was fun, and I hope we get to - Fei?"

"Hmm?" I glanced back at Duo. I'd been looking around for the two permanent street fixtures that seemed to always appear whenever I wanted to get intimate with my boyfriends.

"I said, I had a great time and I hope we get to do it again soon. I just hope Heero's back and ready to take you out."

I snorted. "He better be." Duo grinned delightedly and opened the door.

Heero glanced up from the kitchen area where he was sitting in front of his open laptop. Duo rolled his eyes at me.

"Just in time," Heero said in his reserved tones. "The water should be almost ready."

"Water?" Duo asked, then his eyes fell on the table. "Dango!"

"Wait for the tea, Maxwell," Heero said, without looking up. Duo paused with his fingers nearly touching the sticky dumplings. He made a face but obediently sat down and started looking intently at the kettle on the hob as if he could make it boil faster.

I sat down more slowly. "You already ate a huge slice of pie and part of mine as well, Duo."

"Yeah, so?" Duo's eyes stayed fixed on the kettle and brightened visibly when it started to mutter.

I shook my head and smiled at Heero. He graced me with his small smirk in return, but I thought it was slightly delayed. He closed his laptop and rose to get the kettle. "Did you have a good time?" he asked over his shoulder.

"Super!" While Heero made the tea, Duo started telling him about our afternoon - the part we'd bought tickets for, not the free entertainment at the end. He continued to talk while he swallowed half the dango, drank the tea like a shot and licked his fingers.

"You'd have liked it, 'Ro," he concluded as he looked a bit longingly at the remaining red bean dumplings. Heero pushed the plate firmly away, saving some for later. Duo shrugged then brightened. "Say, tomorrow's the finals. Maybe we could all go together?"

"The finals?" Heero took a sip of tea. "I...guess. Will there be many people?"

Duo and I shared a glance. The crowd was one issue, six particular members of it were another; we debated in silence and our eyes concluded we shouldn't expect any more trouble from those kids, especially if Heero was with us. "Dunno, the gym was mostly empty today, but there'll be more for the finals...Tell you what, we can go and if yo- we're not comfortable we can go elsewhere."

Heero's gaze dropped to the table. "You two can always-"

"If it's the time for all of us together, then it's all or none of us, Yuy. No one bows out," Duo growled, clonking his teacup down. "That's what, rule number two?"

Heero looked like he was about to argue, but nodded instead.

"Good!" Duo stood up with his usual energy. "Now I'll let you two get ready for your time out. I hate to eat and run, but Hilde's expecting me for supper tonight. Apparently someone - Quatre probably - leaked news of our arrangement out to our immediate circle, and Hilde said I can show up tonight with pizza and some juicy details, or she'll show up tomorrow with a meat-hook and a plan to wring them out of me. Don't worry," he added to my concerned frown and Heero's scowl. "I'll only give her the edited highlights. But they'll find out sooner or later! And as far as Hil is concerned it's sooner or my ass is grass! And we'll be too busy next week to have a pow-wow."

"You're probably right, and that reminds me." I gave them both a serious look. "While I'm packing tomorrow evening, you two should take the time to go out."

"What's that?" Duo glanced back as he washed his hands at the sink.

"Out where?" Heero asked, after taking a sip of tea.

"We said we'd make time for everyone, and you mentioned going out with Heero as well, Duo, when you made the rules."

"Fei, buddy, me 'n Heero live together. And work in the same office, a lot. We see each other all the time," Duo threw over his shoulder. Heero was also looking at me, puzzled.

"I meant, go out on a date."

Duo spun around and Heero stared at me. "A- a date? Me and Heero?"

"Yes." I tried not to flush, pinned by two stares. "Look, we've not talked much about this, after we, well, after we sorted things out that first day but..." I sighed, cast away my reserve, trod on my embarrassment as I stood and put my hands on the counter. "Guys. We're in a threesome. I know you want to share me, but you're going to have to learn to be intimate with each other as well or things will get very embarrassing fast for -... I don't want to spend all our time with me shunting from one to the other, or acting only as friends when the three of us are together."

"But Fei!" Duo looked completely lost. "I can't go 'out' out with Heero, that'd be...weird! He's my- my brother, man, not my boyfriend."

There was a clunk on the counter that stopped me from arguing. Heero had dropped his cup and was staring at Duo with an unusual expression. I felt chilled at the sudden vulnerability I read in his face. Duo froze like a rabbit in the oncoming headlights of an eighteen-wheeler.

"Heero?" he said, looking bewildered and very worried. "What's the matter? I- I thought, that is, we knew, we're not, we- I thought we kinda thought the same way on that-"

"Brother?" Heero said softly. "Is that really how you think of me?" His face closed again as he looked down and noticed his cup and a small pool of spilled tea on the counter.

"I-well- yes! But I-" Duo stuttered and gave me a helpless, beseeching glance that I was unable to respond to, I didn't know how to handle this either.

Heero carefully moped up the tea with his napkin. "I've never had any family before," he said softly.

Duo and I were silent as we quickly reevaluated the situation.

"I-..." Heero's words seemed to be drawn out by our silence. "I've never lived with anyone after Odin died, not really - and he always insisted we were only pretending to be family. When you stopped by to sleep on my couch one day and never left I-... I didn't understand. How we could get along so well but still argue and want to live apart every once and awhile. I am friends with Quatre and Trowa, but I've never felt as close to them as I do to you, even when you drive me crazy. Brothers." He seemed to weigh the words as he put the tea cup at the center of one of the large squares decorating the counter top. "I...think I like that."

Duo stared at him, then moved forward slowly, face dead serious. Heero glanced up and grew a bit defensive at the slow advance. Duo stopped when he was standing just above him.

Even I blinked in shock at Duo's speed as he grabbed Heero by the neck and bent him towards the counter, rifling the rich chocolate hair with his other hand. "Isn't he sweet?!" he shouted over the resulting growl, smiling at me gleefully. "I think he's just adorable. Whaddya say, Fei? Can we keep him?"

"Maxwell!" Heero snarled and tried to bat Duo's hand away, but his heart didn't seem to be quite in it.

I gave a long-suffering sigh and finished my tea, thinking: brothers, my ass. One of these days, guys, you'll realize that there's another reason for two people to be much closer than friends even if they argue every once in awhile. And I'll be here to tell you 'I told you so'. But I would take the advice I'd given Duo earlier. Some things could not be forced, they had to come naturally. I'd let them figure it out by themselves, with only the smallest loving push here and there, of course.

Heero managed to fight Duo off, and the latter skipped away avoiding retaliation. His eyes were bright, his cheeks flushed and happy, and Heero got the same warm look I did as he shouted: "Well, gotta go and get that pizza for Hil. You guys be good! Don't get into any fights! Or if you do, win them!" He grabbed his jacket and was out the door before the echoes of his words had faded.

Heero gazed at the door blankly. "Fights?"

"So where did you want to go tonight?" I asked nervously, steering the conversation away from the trouble of this afternoon. I didn't want Heero to start scowling.

I would have liked the scowl better than the mask that came over his face then. It was all the more shocking as he'd been so open just a few minutes before.

"What do you want to do?" His voice was neutral, almost harsh, and sounded indifferent, but then again I was rather used to it. I didn't let it faze me, and I also didn't turn the question back on him. I quickly changed mental gears; this was not Duo. Heero would feel better with some framework, an idea of what I expected. That was just the way he was.

"Let's go for a walk." Chang Wufei, master of the exciting date. But he had caught me a bit short, and anyway, this was Yuy. If I was in Dating 101, he was in kindergarten.

"A walk?" A slight lessening of tension in his shoulders indicated I'd guessed right. He needed some idea of what I expected...and probably felt up to handling a walk.

"Yes. There's a park!" I was really fishing here. "The other night, when I, erm...went to reflect." When I bolted like a tiger with its tail on fire. "I found this little park that looked fairly nice. Well, for L2. They do know how to use concrete, you have to give them that. But there were a few trees. It's off in that direction somewhere." I waved at the umbrella stand.

I turned back to find two wide blue eyes staring at me. "Wufei, that's over two hours walk away."

"It is? Maybe you're thinking about another park."

"That would be difficult, since they've only got one on this colony, and however upset we made you I think you'd have noticed if you'd gone outside in a pressure suit to-"

"Okay, well, that one then," I said, struggling to maintain the light, easy attitude that came so naturally to my other boyfriend.

"I can't believe you ran that far."

"Hah, it visibly wasn't far enough," I joked, straight-faced, while nudging his arm, and boy did I wish I hadn't.

The flash of hurt in his eyes was immediately replaced with self-annoyance as he realized I'd been kidding with him. And that look came back, the one that had gone away when I'd suggested the walk.

He lifted his head as I put my hand on either side of him and leaned against the counter until I was inches from his face.

"Spill, Yuy. What's wrong?"

"Wrong?" He looked both bull-headed and at bay.

"Yes, wrong. Come on, I know I'm not the world's greatest date, but you look like you're about to self-destruct."

"No," Heero replied seriously which gave me all the information I needed about his state of mind at present. Back into war-mode. Take everything literally. Mask fully on. But why?

"I just don't know what you want..." It was a whisper, a trickle of breath that had slipped past the mask, while its owner had his eyes fixed firmly on my feet and his jaw as hard as Gundanium.

"Well I wanted to go for a walk, but now I'd rather we figure out what's bothering you. Rule number one, right?"

Heero nodded infinitesimally. His eyes were still fixed on my shoes. I wanted to lift his chin, I wanted to get him to talk, I wanted to ask him what the hell was wrong, but I restrained myself, letting him take his time and regroup behind the mask. I didn't move though, still boxing him in against the kitchen counter.

"I just...wanted to be with you. Ever since the war ended and you left." Finally the words started. He didn't lift his eyes; they were frowning inward in concentration. "I don't actually know what I feel - I don't have anything to compare it with. But I just couldn't stop thinking about you, and I wanted to be wherever you were. But I never thought...I didn't realize that there was a whole set of behavior that went with a relationship. Dating. Making out. I realized I had no idea what you expected."

I managed to force myself not to say anything - despite having a lot to say at this point - because I had a feeling he had more to work through.

"I went to the library this afternoon." That threw me. My eyebrows shot up and I had to bite back the words that nearly tumbled from my lips. "I did a bit of research on the net too, when I had some time, but for some reason most of the sites I found on relationships were mainly concerned with sex, and though they had a lot about that, quite a lot, they didn't have much about what was expected before and after." The look he gave me was serious and straightforward, and I nodded quickly and encouragingly, and threatened my body with a thousand tortures if it squirmed and flushed at that point.

"The library was...informative, I guess. They had a lot of books under the Love And Romance section-"

At this point a whimper tried to escape my throat. I had a visual of Heero curled up in a library armchair, reading a book and taking notes with a serious expression. Please, please, please let him have picked up a good book, a classic literature piece where things were realistic and, well, normal, and not a bodice-ripper because god knows he probably would not have made the distinction and if this was going to be his template of behavior-

"But it turned out to be only more confusing." I cringed. "All of the dozen of books I read were -"

"Dozen?" I gasped despite my resolution to not interrupt.

"I wanted a good sampling of acceptable behaviour," Heero replied seriously and I remembered he could speed-read. Damn. "But as far as I could see, there doesn't seem to be any common basic rules. Well, there are a few, but I think if I give you flowers you'd probably resort to physical violence so-"

"Good call," I muttered, then ran with the idea. "That's what those books were trying to tell you, Heero. Everyone's different. You have to be yourself. Don't rely on anything you find in books." Please don't rely on anything you find in a book with a strong man holding a fainting woman to his chest in lurid watercolors on the cover and the kind of pink prose that would make a corpse cringe and blush. "Do what your feelings tell you."

"...They're not telling me anything. Except that I want to be with you, and that, sooner or later, probably sooner, I'm going to make a mistake. I don't know how to...I don't know how to make you happy..."

Oh come on, what is this?! First Duo and now Heero? I thought I was the one with low self-esteem in this coup- threesome! This was my fault. Me and my bloody restraint, my inability to express my feelings. I almost blurted out those three words I'd been practicing this morning, but instinctively I knew that wouldn't be right, or rather, not enough. Heero didn't actually know what those words meant, in a way. He didn't know what they entailed, how he was supposed to behave. For someone who'd been programmed for most of his life, this truly must be terrifying.

"...I just don't know why you'd want to be with -"

"Be with someone who can surpass me in most things? Be with someone who can challenge me, be both my rival and my brother in arms?" I finally grabbed his chin and dragged his eyes up to mine. I wanted to be sure there was no misunderstanding about what I was about to say. "You can't see why I'd want to be with someone who can follow his instincts of right and wrong, whatever the cost to himself? Who is like a beacon when everything else is muddled, ugly and confused? Who can drag me back from the mouth of hell, even at the cost of his own life?"

Blue eyes looked into mine, straightforward, searching.

"Someone who is brave enough to follow his feelings, even when he doesn't know where they lead?" I whispered, knowing my own shame at my shortcomings might be visible in my eyes and not caring. "Someone who can admit to being lost? To being afraid of failure?"

I saw his eyes flinch at the word 'failure'. I wish I could say everything was going to be alright, but I'd choke on the triteness and besides he deserved an equal honesty on my part.

"You will probably make mistakes, Yuy. And I'm rather glad of it, because it will mean you'll have finally left those bloody guide-rails that were imposed on you and have limited you from growing as a person. Take it from one who has made a lot of mistakes. Failure is only something to be feared if you do not learn from it. Or if you let it haunt you so much that you dare not take a step. But if you think your mistakes will drive me away...Heero, you could chop me into cat food and I'd still want to be with you."

Blue eyes blinked. I sighed.

"Okay, that could have come out better," I muttered. Apparently when I let my own feelings run my mouth, I tended to blurt out the most inane things. And people wonder why I'm so rigid and guarded. "But all I said before is true. I want to be with you too, because of who you are, not because you're going to give me flowers - and yeah, I will break your arm if you try that - or because you know what or what not to do. I'm pretty new at this too anyway, I'm not expecting much. Just...follow your feelings. And don't lock me out. That's all I want from you."

Heero nodded slowly. I couldn't read the thoughts flashing through those eyes as they stayed locked with mine.

"So...was there anything in particular you wanted to do?" I said, trying to get my brain working again, riveted as it was to that patch of night sky in his eyes.

"Yes." It was the voice of Heero Yuy again, firm, measured, some would say cold but that's only because they don't have ears to hear. I must admit I was a bit surprised; I don't believe in miracles, I didn't think he'd actually become a confident boyfriend just because of my little speech. I was expecting him to be a bit lost still, and to need a bit more of a push.

"Oh...well, what was it you wanted to do?" I tried to keep my voice level and assured - yes, my pride is one weakness I cling to.

Heero looked thoughtful as if he was consulting a Gundam repair manual. Then he slipped his hands around my face and kissed me.

It was strong and sure as I had come to expect, but there was a hint of something else now. A flutter of uncertainty and a hint of hope that equated to a drop of...passion. The last thought flickering through my mind was, this was what they meant when they said a kiss was intoxicating.

I kept enough control over myself to keep an eye on what my lips and own hands were doing - they were safely anchored around his neck - because I was sorely tempted to throw him down on the ground and jump on him in a way that would definitely require a rule number five, and probably a rule number six, seven and eight as well.

"A walk sounds good," Heero said, pulling away again. He smiled - or rather smirked - as I tried to remember how to talk, then finally gave up and nodded. I stayed in a daze from the kiss and from the unaccustomed intimacy, the nearness we'd shared through our words that had reached deep into me and scooped out a bit more of that curdled old solitude I used to relish in. I would have trod on the dog if Heero hadn't stopped me.

"Good evening," Heero said politely.

"Hmph." The dog yipped as its master yanked on the lead. I stared after them. In the state I was in, still bathed in the warmth and sunshine of my afternoon with Duo, and Heero's strong, firm grasp on my hand, I could even find the man and the mutt a wonderful addition to the neighborhood.

 

 

Heero and I walked. We didn't quite make it to the park but we walked for nearly two hours, either talking about the past and the future, or in peaceful silence. We made it home just as Duo was about to creep in on tiptoe. We had some more work in the morning, we couldn't afford to go to bed late. Duo looked a bit startled when we told him our date had consisted of a walk - "A stroll? On L2? Were the garbage cans blooming for you?" - but then I caught his thoughtful look at Heero as the latter went to get ready for bed, followed by an enthusiastic thumbs-up in my direction. Apparently I had 'done okay' in the Heero Yuy relaxation duty.

I was tired but something was keeping me from sleeping despite the warmth and comfort of the two forms curled up by my side. I'd forgotten something. I struggled to wake up fully, stared at the darkened ceiling.

Damn it! I hadn't told them! Good grief, if Master Li could see what a spineless idiot he'd left as sole representative of his clan, he'd be livid.

Calm breathing in harmony on either side of me was robbing me of wakefulness, rocking me to sleep. But I had to say something. Heck, this was probably the best time, while they were asleep.

"Heero? Duo?" I whispered, keeping my voice much lower than their gentle breathing. "I wanted to tell you both...I...I really - ...I sincerely - ...I - I really need to tell you how much you both - oh, Confucius can go to hell." With that minor blasphemy I closed my eyes and let sleep unravel my thoughts.

Maybe I was dreaming, but I thought I head someone mutter: "Stupid, you've been telling us all day. Now let us sleep already."

"Hn."

I was probably dreaming...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End, no more of this series I'm afraid, though it would have been so much fun to explore Rule Number Five...


End file.
